You're Not Crazy, Annie
by justanordinarygirlsas
Summary: "Annie. That was my last thought before the pain took over." Finnick's "ghost" comes to Annie for a last goodbye, but she believes he is simply another hallucination. How can Finnick give Annie closure when he can't seem to leave her? When Annie's life is threatened, Finnick realizes he has to save himself before he can save the girl he loves... End/Post Mockingjay. Please R & R!
1. Preface & Realizations

**Finnick**

* * *

It was confusing, disorienting, and frightening. Before, there had always been a way to escape, but not this time. Not if the others had a chance of surviving. I knew this was it, but I wasn't ready for the pain. After all I had witnessed, I thought maybe it wouldn't be so bad.

I was wrong.

I hadn't anticipated the burning agony flowing through my veins. I couldn't feel anything besides the pain. I remember floating, everything being stripped away from me with agonizing lashes against my skin. Everything, but her.

_Annie._

That was my last thought before the pain took over.

* * *

Everything hurt. The pain was there; I wasn't sure if it would ever go away, but it seemed like a glass wall had been put it and my mind, which was fine with me. The pain seemed distant, as if coming from far away, so I decided to stay away from the wall in my mind. I didn't want the glass to break. I didn't want to feel the torture again.

As I floated toward the surface of consciousness, pieces of memories came back to me, like images moving behind my closed eyes.

Peeta pressing his handcuffs into his chafing wrists.

Gale pushing Katniss up the ladder.

The lizard muttations, and their cold, menacing stares.

I shivered internally. I was dead. Really, truly dead. Now I didn't want to open my eyes, afraid of what I might see. I tried to use my senses and get a feel of where I could possibly be, but I couldn't feel a thing. Something was missing. Something important.

I'd rather be in the capitol with the ladies and their secrets than open my eyes. If I opened my eyes, this would be real. And I was afraid that the big gaping hole inside me would rip me apart for good. I didn't know why it was there, but I had a feeling that whatever I saw when I opened my eyes would fill me in.

I told myself to be a man, and that Finnick Odair would never be such a wimp. Crap.

I opened my eyes slowly, squinting at the bright light, ready to shut them again if I had to. I blinked twice, my eyes adjusting to the change. Then, my eyebrows pressed together in confusion. All I saw around me was white and light. It wasn't exactly peaceful, but I wasn't frightened.

I was lying down, so I tried to stand even though I still couldn't feel the floor, or anything else for that matter. I closed my eyes again, but not because I was scared. I imagined I was underwater, where I was always safe and confident. I remembered the way I used to swim deep in the ocean, and how I would use the pressure of the water to push myself into a standing position. I would gaze up at the surface of the water as the early morning sunlight playfully danced on its tips. Opening my eyes, I sadly shook away the blissful memory but found that I could stand up in this way.

Further away, I saw a flickering movement. I couldn't tell how far it was because, like in the ocean, it was impossible to judge distance in the vast pool of white.

The instant my eyes made contact with the movement, I felt myself get dragged forward by an invisible wind. The pain I had buried intensified, threatening to break the glass wall in my mind. The infinite whiteness changed to blinding and confusing colors, with dizzying motions all around me. My hands flew to the sides of my head and I heard myself yelling, the pain more acute with each dizzying moment.

As quickly as it had started, everything came to a sudden stop. I took deep breaths, trying to slow my racing heart, but what I saw next took my breath away.

I was in a large and familiar building, the smell of stale and not-so-fresh food in the air. How could I even smell anything? I dismissed the thought and continued to look around. The tables were full of people in boring and uniform clothing, chatting quietly under murmured breaths. I looked to my right, seeing a young man glance at his wrist, peering at something written in ink. I could make out something that resembled a schedule. Memories of District Thirteen surfaced in my mind as I realized where I was.

Everyone was looking down at their small portions of food or talking to their neighbor. My face was open in dumbfounded shock, but nobody seemed to notice me. Everyone but one person, who was staring straight at me.

The gaping hole in my chest was filled with bittersweet shock as my last thought came back to me and _clicked_, giving a name to the image before me, the missing piece of myself that I could never truly forget.

_Annie._

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***Update: I combined the Preface and Chapter One into one longer chapter-Old readers, don't be confused:)***

**End of the Chappy one:) PLEASE let me know what you guys think. Suggestions accepted.**

**Now that I've described it a little more, I can get to the fun Finnick and Annie stuff.**

**R & R Pleaseeeeee!**

**[My first FINNIFIC (Finnick Fanfiction? See what I did there? Hehe.)]**

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_**  
**


	2. Persuasions

**Finnick**

* * *

Her sea green eyes poured into mine, and in that moment all I wanted was to hold her in my arms.

"Annie," I whispered, not trusting my voice to speak without breaking. I knew she heard me. I blinked as a tear escaped my eye. "Annie, I've missed you," I said a little louder. Her eyes widened and turned glossy, but she bit her lip and looked down. Her lips moved fast and quietly as she murmured to herself, her eyes shut and her body rocking slightly back and forth.

"Annie, are you alright?" The voice was not mine this time, and a young man I recognized form Thirteen put his hand on her shoulder. He soothed her, murmuring nonsensical things to her until she opened her eyes and looked at him.

I wanted to slap him in the face.

Okay, maybe that was irrational thinking, but I needed to be the one to comfort her, not some kid she didn't even know!

"I'll be fine. Thanks, Julian."

And that's all it took to make me forget whatever was going through my head. Annie's soft and melodic voice trembled slightly. Julian raised his eyebows at her.

"I just miss Fin, that's all." she sighed, looking anywhere but it my direction. Her voice somehow sounded delicate and fiercely affectionate at the same time.

"Annie, please. It's me." I said quickly. "Please come here. Please talk to me." My voice broke on the last word, and I realized I had removed the space between us. The only thing holding me back from my girl was the hard, metal table.

"It's not real, Annie. He'll be back soon," came Julian's gentle voice as Annie's eyes widened at my words.

That's when I realized what was happening. Annie thought I was one of her hallucinations. I looked more closely and saw the fear and disbelief that tinged her eyes. I was hurting her.

Slowly, I got down on my knees. I knew I should leave her, but I had to say goodbye somehow. I needed her to really see me, if only for a moment.

"I'm sorry, honey," I said softly. "Don't be afraid. I'm not going to hurt you." I resisted the impulse to put my hand on her leg. I had to take a deep breath before I spoke. "Please take a big leap of faith and meet me in our room," I started again, "Just for a minute." I stood up and took a few steps toward the exit. "I won't try any of those complicated moves this time," I laughed, trying to keep the sadness out of my smile.

Annie's cheeks betrayed her as they burned red at my comment.

"That's my girl," I said softly, and walked out of the room, praying she would follow.

Like in a dream, I couldn't remember the specifics, but I suddenly found myself standing next to the bed in the room I share with Annie. Well, the room I _shared_, I corrected myself. It should have been impossible, but I heard Annie's voice echoing in my mind.

"I just need to rest for a little," I heard her say. "The baby makes me so tired, sometimes." She let out a small nervous laugh, but my stomach dropped.

The baby!

How could I leave her alone with a baby? She was pregnant; I'd forgotten she was pregnant. Memories painfully flooded in my mind of another girl, another time where pregnancy was used as an excuse. I'd blamed Katniss's emotions during the Quell on her baby. It seemed ironic now that fate had twisted the situation around. Annie's baby was no fake story for the masses to feed on. It was her child-our chiild. And it would never have a father.

Footsteps echoed softly down the hallway, the door opened, and Annie stepped inside the room. She closed the door and stood with her back to me, taking deep breaths. We stayed like that for about a minute. Then, slowly, she turned around to face me.

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**End of chappy 2:)**

**Suggestions?**

**Keep reading! I want to reveal the plot twist right now, but that's no fun...**

**Much more romance to come, I'm just easing into the story first. Yeah, character development!**

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**Aw man, I love Finnick!**


	3. Goodbyes

**Finnick**

* * *

"You're not real," she said firmly, but it sounded more like a question.

"You sound like Peeta."

"You're supposed to be with Peeta."

"Well, um...Yeah," I couldn't say it.

"You could at least do a better job of convincing me you're not one of my crazy hallucinations." Annie sat down on the bed, a resigned look in her eyes. "Normally, you're a lot more convincing," she continued. "I must have used up all the good stuff."

I walked over to the bed. I didn't try to sit next to her, not knowing if I'd actually be able to. I didn't think I wanted to know the answer.

"Do you see me a lot, Annie?" I asked.

"You mean when you're not actually here? Well, you should know the answer to that, shouldn't you? If you're the fake Finnick, shouldn't you remember if you've been here or not? Or is my mind just trying to confuse me?" Annie didn't stop rambling until I interrupted her.

"I'm right here, honey. It's going to be okay." The words I'd repeated to her countless times when she was lost to the world came out of my mouth before I could stop them. I realized too late how ironic this was, and my stomach twisted sickeningly as I heard the broken promise in my words. She wouldn't be okay when I couldn't be there to help her.

My conscience reminded me once again that it was my fault she'd been through so much. Time after time, my actions led to consequences that hurt Annie. Even from the beginning, it was true; it had been my arrogance that had gotten Annie picked for the reaping.

I expected her to leave, or at least to yell at me for ruining her life, but Annie's eyes only widened slightly at my response.

"No, I haven't seen you before," she finally said. "But I always hear you say those words when things get confusing. Well, I hear the _real _you say those words."

"I know, honey." I said. I didn't try to explain. I understood that this must be my dying wish in effect. A true miracle. This was my chance to give Annie my last goodbye. I wouldn't waste it by making her sad.

"Finn, I miss you so much." Annie's voice broke with sadness.

"I'll always miss you, Annie," I told her softly.

"You should go," she told me. "_Real_ you wouldn't like this."

I had to make her smile. I needed to make her happy just one more time.

"Why?" I asked, a smirk on my face. "Do you find this," I ripped off the clothes I was wearing, leaving myself in only my underwear, "Distracting?"

Whatever she was feeling, Annie burst into laughter, her cheeks reddening with the sudden movement. That's when I saw my girl's true self reflect on her face. I'd forgotten how wonderful her laugh was. It was bright and loud because she never held back when she laughed. I felt myself grinning back at her, feeling truly happy. I silently thanked whatever had allowed this moment to happen.

"You should really stop doing that," she said, still laughing. "It gives you a bad reputation."  
"I'll do whatever I want, thank you very much," I replied.

"Oh, I forgot! You're perfect and you can do anything!"

"Of course."

"You always think things through."  
"Every time."

"Even that time I told you not to eat an entire bowl of sugar cubes?"

"Hey," I said in a mock-serious voice. "Sugar cubes are one of the two weaknesses I have." Annie giggled again. "Really," I insisted. "I cannot be held responsible for anything involving sugar cubes!" Man, I really wanted a sugar cube now.

"What's your other weakness?" Annie asked curiously.

"You, of course. But you already knew that," I said coyly.

"Yup," Annie said happily. Then, the grin on her face faded. I don't know if it was because she realized the more serious meaning of our words under the facade of our playful banter or because she remembered she wasn't supposed to be talking with a figment of her imaginaiton. Either way, I saw the dullness I hated so much creep back into her eyes. My heart squeezed. It was too soon, and I wasn't ready.

"Annie, just talk to me," I said, my voice pleading. "Just for a little longer, please." I looked down, unable to meet her eyes as I thought of how selfish I was being. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I acknowledged the fact that my clothes had reappeared on my body, fully intact.

"I can't forget what's really going on, Finn," she said sadly. "I have to keep waiting for you to come back to me." She must have seen a change in my face beacuse she continued speaking quickly. "I know you will, baby. I'm not worried about that," she said, trying to assure me, or maybe it was herself she was trying to convince. "This is like cheating," she admitted."You can't be here, Finn."

Her eyes filled with tears, and I understood how hard this was for her. Annie was turning her back on what she thought was her escape from reality, and she was doing it for me. If only she knew this was the last memory we'd have together.

"I don't want to see you again until you're _really_ here," she said, her voice stronger now. She gave me a grin then. "As soon as you walk in this room I'm going to throw my arms around you and kiss you until I'm too dizzy to stand." I couldn't help smiling at that.

"Then we'll just move to the bed so you don't have to worry about that," I laughed. I almost started teasing her some more, but reality hit me. I had to listen to Annie. How could I expect her to take care of herself if I encouraged her to succumb to her hallucinations? I took a deep breath. I needed to tell Annie a few more things. There were a few more tricks, a few more memories, a few more lessons, that she needed to hold on to. I wouldn't be there anymore to help her, to love her.

"The baby is going to be so beautiful," was all I could say. Annie nodded in agreement, and that was the ending of our last moment.

My heart started pounding. What I had come to think of as the glass wall in my mind was cracking. I tried not to yell, afraid of frightening Annie, but a moan slipped out.

"Finn?"

It was then that Julian walked in. The pain in my head was mind numbing and the light in the room seemed to be slowly fading, but I focused as hard as possible to make out what was going on.

"Annie? I think you should come with me," came Julian's voice. "Beetee wants to talk to you." Annie seemed confused, looking in my direction, but she stood up.

"Annie! No!"

She couldn't hear me. I looked down and saw that my body had become transparent.

"No!" I shouted again, as if that could somehow change anything. Because I knew what Beetee would say to her, and I was afraid that when Annie found out she might lose herself forever.

I frantically tried to memorize Annie's face, body, everything. I wanted to remember every movement she made, every blink of her eyes.

"I love you!" I screamed, desperately trying to get through to her.

Then the door to our room closed, and I realized I truly could not exist without Annie. Whatever cord that had held me here and to my girl was snapped at the same time the door shut. Our connection was broken. The pain overwhelmed me, and I was gone.

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**That's it for now, but if I can finish I'll post another chapter tonight!**

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**Thanks to everyone who has been following! Plot twist coming soon-ish!**

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_


	4. Tears

**Hey, everyone! Normally, I leave my little notes at the end of each chapter, but I just want to say a couple things before you guys read on...**

**1) First of all, thank you all SO much for the reviews and comments. They absolutely made my day. I just wanted to say that I decided to write this story because I feel like, despite the awesome Finnick/Annie fanfics out there, not a lot focus on what happens after Finnick dies - probably because it isn't easy to write. Anyway, I just wanted to capture a side of Finnick and Annie I feel could be developed more. Also, I'm planning to write this story like a real book, so it will be long. Please hang in if you've come this far, because I have a couple of plot twists that are really well thought out, but I need to build up to them to make a really good story.**

**2) I swear that this story will not always be so depressing :P. Although, the next few chapters would be a very poor example of optimism, considering Annie finds out Finn is dead. (Shoutout to meredev and The Curse of Normality :) )**

**3) I'm done rambling now, I swear. YAY for first chapter in Annie's POV! (Did ya just notice?)**

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**Annie**

* * *

I followed Julian down the hallway to meet Beetee. If I hadn't been so distracted by my latest hallucination, I might have noticed that Julian didn't even meet my eyes as he mumbled something about Beetee being in the next room. I was busy replaying what had just happened in my head. Finnick had seemed so real, in a way that was different from my other hallucinations. It was hard to believe that my mind was able to recreate such a perfect likeness of him, but I guess I was just getting better at it. I winced, knowing how upset Finnick would be to hear I'd given in to my other reality. I couldn't help it, really. I also couldn't help wishing Julian hadn't torn me away from whatever had been happening.

In a way, I was thankful. My mind had found a way to cope while I waited in agony for Finnick to come back. I opened the door to the conference room, where Beetee and Coin were talking with their backs to me. As soon as I came in, though, the talking immeadiately ceased. That should have been another warning sign, but I was too wrapped up in savoring the memory my mind had given me.

I didn't even really hear what Beetee was saying. He repeated it several times before I could even concentrate. I heard the words that came out of his mouth, but I could only make sense of them individually. Stringing them together was like speaking a different language. I didn't understand. I saw Beetee's eyes looking at me with concern - no, more than that. His eyebrows were moving, making wrinkles appear and dissapear on his forehead. His lips were moving, but no sound was reaching my ears. A pair of hands reached out to grab me.

I ran away, down the hallway, leaving behind me any hope for happiness or sanity.

"Finnick!" was all I could scream.

I was in my room, leaning on the table for support.

"Finnick!" My legs refused to keep me standing, and my knees dug into the cold, hard floor as I fell.

"Finnick!" Sobs racked my body, which shook violently as I rocked back and forth, unable to breath through my tears.

"Finn! Finn, no, please!" I cried, banging my fists against the floor. The world was twisted through my tear-filled and blurry eyes. Everything was wrong; nothing was okay now.

"Please," I cried, my voice now in a broken whisper. I could hardly speak. "Please, Finn. You promised!" My hands were against my head, trying to keep away the pain. No, I would take the pain. I would take it a thousand times, if Finnick was just next to me. The worst part was I knew this was no delusion. I knew this was reality.

"Finnick!" I threw my hands over my eyes and put my head on my knees, trying to make the world vanish as it had so many times before. "Make it go away!" I screamed, kicking my feet out from under me.

A pair of hands gently lifted mine off my eyes. I looked up, blinking through my tears, and saw the one thing that could make things better.

Finnick was kneeling in front of me. My gorgeous, beautiful Finnick was here. His dazzling green eyes were looking at me. They were full of something that was stronger than pain and deeper than sadness, but they were there.

"How did you get here?" I asked. I could hardly hear my own words, but Finnick understood. He always understood me. He was staring at his hands, as if he was in shock that he could touch me, but he mumbled something about a white room.

His look of amazement confused me. Why should it come as a surprise that he could touch me? He was, after all, a figment of my wonderfully crazy mind. He could do whatever I wanted him to do.

It was then I decided that I didn't care. I wouldn't question my sweet time with this boy any longer. Before I knew it he had helped me to my feet and was trying to speak, but I wouldn't let him.

I wrapped my arms around Finn's neck and kissed him with a passion I had never known before. My hands were tangled and dancing in his perfect bronze hair. I gave myself over to Finnick completely. His body was hard against mine, as unable to resist the attraction between us as I was. Still, I could tell that some part of Finn was trying, unsuccessfully, to pull away. I kissed him harder. His body responded, but I could tell his mind was still trying to fight, so I pulled away. Finnick tried to speak, but I beat him to it.

"Is it really you?" Finnick's eyes changed as I saw him judging the right thing to say, but he gave me the words I both wanted to hear.

"Yes, honey. It's me," he said, sounding a little confused but certain of his answer. That was all I needed. I pulled my lips to his again, but he pulled away.

"No," he said, gasping for breath. "We can't do this. We shouldn't be doing this." I looked up to meet his eyes, begging.

"Finn, I need you," I said, ignoring the tears that hadn't stopped falling. "Please don't make me wait any more."

I saw any of Finn's remaining resistance crumble. He kissed each of my fallen tears tenderly before meeting my lips, eunglufing the both of us in a fiery and passionate embrace. I became too dizzy to stand, and so he eased me onto the bed, never breaking our kiss. A small smile came to my lips as I remembered the conversation we had had not too long ago.

Our kisses were bittersweet, tasting of passion and the tears that now silently streaked down both our faces. Finnick gave me all his love, our bodies becoming one with each other. I fell asleep on Finnick's smooth chest, his arm cradling me as I cried. I was content here, in the deep recesses of my mind, but of course the world was too cruel to allow that. I woke up to the sound of Finnick crying out in pain, and then he was gone.

I was alone.

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_~Just an ordinary girl :D_


	5. Questions

**Finnick**

* * *

I woke up in the white room that never seemed to end. My head pounded, and every blink of an eye took effort, but I slowly got up. I was becoming used to this by now. I took deep breaths for a minute, waiting for the sharp pains to push themselves to the back of my mind, where they would stay until my trip ended.

_Annie._

The thought of her always hit me like that. Out of nowhere, I could only focus on her. The feeling of emptiness in my chest vanished instantly, and then I was being pulled forward to where I knew I would find her.

I didn't want to question what had been happening to me, so I tried to push away my questions and doubts. If this was heaven, I would accept it graciously, but deep down, I knew there were too many kinks in the system for this to be heaven. For one thing, Annie was definitely still alive. For another, this was too good to be true.

I wasn't naive, no matter how much I wished I could ignore whatever my gut was trying to tell me. The pain was worse each time I woke up, and each time I was with Annie I was violently thrusted away from her. Each time, I couldn't remember anything between leaving Annie and waking up in the infinite white room. I hated to be that guy who questions the good things given to him, but all I could think of was that, even in death, my actions could somehow still hurt Annie.

I was suddenly in District Thirteen. I blinked my eyes a few times, trying to adjust to my new surroundings. I was in the room Coin would always call Katniss and me to when we needed to talk about war strategies. Chairs filled one large, long table. Sitting in the last chair on the left was Annie, spinning herself back and forth on the its wheels. She was absolutely beautiful, and only looked more perfect when her eyes lit up at the sight of me. Just seeing Annie was like medicine. The pain in my head was easy to ignore when I had her with me.

"Finn!" Her arms were around me, our lips meeting in a soft but earnest kiss. Our lips parted, but she didn't let go of me, and I didn't want her to. I scooped Annie up in my arms easily and sat down on the table, letting her lie in my arms. I saw her breath easier at my simple touch.

I couldn't believe I could even touch Annie. When I had touched her hands the last time we were with each other, I was in complete shock. I'd figured I was a ghost and that I couldn't actually touch anything. My hand should have passed right through Annie's body. Instead, I could caress her face, as I was doing now. I could comfort her and hold her. I could even love her. The beauty of touch was something I would never take for granted again.

My fingers trailed lightly over Annie's delicate lips, which were slightly parted as her breath tickled the tips of my fingers. I moved gently down her face until I let my fingers just barely caress her neck. Annie smiled, her chest moving up and down as she breathed with ease. My throat constricted at the thought of all the times I would not be there to help her relax, and that I was the reason Annie had trouble thinking through our messed up lives.

"Shh," Annie sighed, cupping her hand to hold my face. She sat up slowly, and I gave her another kiss, slow and gentle. Neither of us wanted to rush anything. Annie sat in my lap with her head on my shoulders. We stayed that way, without talking, for a long time, content to simply be with each other.

"Annie," I spoke into the peaceful silence of our isolated world, "Don't you think someone might find it strange if they walk in and see you and I sprawled out on the table?"

"They can't see you, silly," she laughed, continuing our idle chatter.

"Well then, I'll change my question," I countered. "Don't you think someone might find it strange if they walk in and see only you sprawled out on the table?"

"Maybe, they will think it's sexy."

"As gorgeously tempting as you are, I'm sure they would," I said, smiling.

"It's not their fault I'm cursed with beauty!"

"I would have to beat them if they even thought about trying anything."

"With what? Your invisible ghost hands?" Annie laughed.

I grabbed Annie and pinned her down to the table. My hands held her arms down while my legs were pressed on either side of her body to keep her still. I brought my face right up to Annie's so that our noses were almost touching.

"I stand corrected," Annie said with a smirk. I just waggled my eyesbrows at her. "What?" she asked.

"I like this position much better," I told her.

Annie playfully pushed me away and I let her sit up. She laughed loudly and put her hand on my shoulder.

"You're funny, Finn. I guess being crazy does have its perks!" Annie's eyes were sparkling and bright from laughing, but I suddenly felt cold.

"What did you say?" I asked. Annie looked at me quizically.

"I said, being crazy has its perks," she repeated. When I didn't say anything, she kept talking. "I mean, I can at least pretend I'm spending time with the real you."

I looked at Annie sadly, not sure what to say. She still didn't think I was real. Honestly, that should have been a good thing. Annie believing I was a hallucination was much more logical than her believing I was my own dead ghost.

"Annie, you don't think I'm real?" were still the words that came out of my mouth, and I was unable to keep the sadness out of my voice. Annie looked at me sympathetically, as if she understood what she had said wrong.

"Of course I think you're real, Finn," she said, but I knew she wasn't telling the truth because her sad eyes didn't match up with the words coming out of her mouth.

"Honey, you need to be honest with me to make this work."

"Okay," Annie said. "I know you're not real, but it's easy to forget that part," she said, trying to make me feel better. "I was already pretty confused last night," she said, blushing. The last time we were with each other was only last night, but it felt like a week ago to me. I didn't have any concept of how long I had been in the white room.

"If I tell myself that you're real, than that's what you will become. Once we spend enough time together, I'll forget that you were ever fake." Annie finished.

Annie thought that she was letting herself go crazy for me. Really, what did I know? Maybe, somehow, she was getting worse by talking to me. My head started to hurt as I confused myself. I took a few breaths, realizing Annie had been watching me without saying a word.

"Annie, I know how I can prove to you that it's really me," I said, realizing the truth in my words as I spoke.

"How, Finn?" she asked. I took a deep breath before answering her.

"I will tell you how I died," I said, but before I could continue, Annie had put her hands to her ears. She was shaking her head back and forth. I put my hands on Annie's shoulders and waited until she would look me in the eye. I had to get through to her.

"Honey, listen to me. I did die, but somehow I am still here with you. If I tell you what happened to me, you can ask Beetee if what I am telling you is the truth. If it is, then you know that I have to be real," I spoke quickly, so that she couldn't interrupt me. Annie looked at me with tears in her eyes.

"You can't tell me, please," Annie whispered.

"Why not?" I asked. "I know it will be hard, but we need to figure out what's going on and we can't do that if-"

"Damn it, Finnick!" Annie yelled. She had started crying. "I knew this would happen," she murmured, more to herself than to me. "I knew this was too good to be true, and now already my mind wants to take you away from me!" I winced as I heard my thoughts echoed in her words.

"I know what will happen if I ask Beetee," Annie said somberly. "You'll disappear," she said. "What you say will be wrong, and then I won't be able to believe that you're here anymore."

I wrapped my arms around Annie tightly, trying to soothe her.

"You can't leave me again, Finn!" she cried.

"I'm not going anywhere," I said, trying to keep my voice as strong as I could.

"You can't know that!" Annie sobbed. I wanted to tell her something different, but she was right.

"You said I am different from the other things you see," I said softly, changing the subject. "What do you mean?" Annie sniffled and didn't let go of me, but I wasn't letting go either.

"I-I'm not sure," she stammered. "Sometimes I get stuck in a memory, but you and I always have new conversations. Other times, everything is extremely confusing and I can't focus, but that hasn't happened with you yet." Annie stopped, thinking of something else to say. "You look more solid, if that even makes sense." she added. I tried to think of what she was saying might mean, but I just didn't know.

"Well, it has to count for something that I'm different," I said.

"I've never slept with any of my hallucinations before," Annie blushed. I knew she was trying to lighten the mood by teasing me the way I tease her, but I also knew it was important that Annie fully understood what was going on. I didn't know when I would be taken away from her for good.

"Annie, I need you to please do this for me," I said. "I need you to trust me, just like you always have," I looked at her seriously, something I didn't do very often. Annie's expression changed and she rolled her eyes, sighing.

"Fine," she grumbled. I readjusted Annie on my lap, putting a hand on the back of her neck and giving her a reassuring kiss, which she returned. I looked into her eyes, seeing past her stubborn facade. I realized just how afraid Annie was to hear what I had to say. What would I do if Annie described the way she died to me? Suddenly, I was afraid to say it out loud myself.

"We were in the sewers when it happened," was all I could say. Annie nodded slowly, seeming to understand my change in attitude.

"I can ask Beetee about that," she said. Somehow, that made me smile. Maybe it was because of Annie's complete faith in me, even when I wasn't even sure what I was anymore.

I held Annie for a while after that. We talked idly, just happy to hear the other's voice. It became harder for me, though, because the pains in my head had increased sharply and weren't going away. I didn't say anything to Annie though, afraid of somehow jinxing everything.

It didn't matter. Without warning, the pain suddenly escalated and I cried out.

"Finnick?" Annie called worriedly, but her voice sounded so far away. Another wave of pain hit, and I involuntarily let go of her.

"Finnick!"

That was the last thing I heard before I was pulled away and under.

* * *

**Hey, everyone! Sorry for the long wait for an update, I had computer problems. I'll update much faster now:)**

**Thoughts? Let me know! By the way, I think there are four chapters left before the first big plot twist.**

~Just an ordinary girl :D


	6. Answers

****NOTE: I'm really stupid. I've been writing BOGGS when I'm really talking about BEETEE. I don't know why I did that. Boggs is dead (:[), and this story goes with the books. I'm fixing the chapters now, so new readers don't get confused.**

**Sorry!**

**(R.I.P Boggs!)****

**Annie**

* * *

"Finnick!" I cried, but it was too late. He had literally disappeared in front of me. I closed my eyes, breathing deeply until my heart rate fell back to a normal pace.

_He isn't real_, I told myself, but I could still feel the warmth from the palm of his hand in mine. I loved him so much, and I knew it would be so easy just to simply give in to my delusions. Life would be so much easier to bear with memories of Finnick swirling freely in my head.

Restlessly, I sighed. I knew I would talk to Beetee, if only to reassure myself. Truthfully, I felt excited to help Finnick again. My heart beat with anticipation as I wandered around to find Beetee, for the moment pushing away the fact that Finn wasn't real.

I needed something to hold on to in my life, and Finnick had always been my anchor. Was it so terrible to pretend he was still there? Murky memories of my life in District Four came back to me, but for once it was not so pleasant. I thought of the many times where inexperienced sailors didn't anchor their boats properly. The ships would simply float away, taunting their sailor with their slow but steady journey to sea. Without my anchor, would I float away from reality completely?

Beetee was in the machinery room, which I found out from Julian, who spent a lot of time helping Beetee with defensive strategies. I ignored his concerned looks and went into the room, leaving Julian outside. He knew better than to follow me.

Inside, I saw Beetee working on some sharp object with little wings. As soon as he saw me, Beetee quickly fumbled around, pressed a few buttons, and set the flying thing down on the table. The little whirring noise it was making stopped as the wings quieted. We looked at each other in silence. Beetee's eyes were full of sympathy and maybe even a little pain, and I wondered in the back of my mind what he saw reflected back in my own eyes.

"How did he die?" I just wanted a straight answer. I couldn't take any more tricks or games, and I realized quickly I just wanted to get out of here. The room itself reminded me of the capitol, and of the tricks it had up its sleeve. One of them had killed Finnick.

Beetee looked at me with his sad eyes, struggling for the words to say.

"We do not yet know all of the details-" he started. That's when I lost it. I grabbed him by the collar of his stupid uniform and yelled in his face.

"How did he die?" I screamed, my voice becoming a shriek. "Tell me!" Beetee's eyes widened at my sudden outburst. I forced my hand to unclench itself and I stood straight.

"Please," I added as politely as I could manage, my jaw clenched with the effort it took not to scream again.

"All we know right now is what we have from the televised broadcast President Snow made last night," Beetee started, eyes me carefully in case I decided to flip out again.

"Did he die in the sewers?" I asked, speaking the words quickly so that I couldn't focus too much on their horrible meaning. Beetee's mouth opened in shock, and I knew what was coming before he spoke.

"How did you know that? All Snow said was that Finnick had died in the Capitol. We only just got word back from one of our special teams that the capitol's men were searching the sewers for his body." I didn't reply, numbed into silence.

"Annie?" he called. I mumbled something about overhearing one of his conversations, causing Beetee's face to return to its normal but still-pale color. I think he was trying to get me to say something else, but his voice just faded into the background. I heard the door close as he left to get me something for some strange way I was acting.

Really, I was okay. At least, that's what I told myself. I wasn't rocking back and forth on the floor. I was standing straight, my hands shaking only slightly. I was still breathing. These were all good signs. Deep down, I must have known something was different when I saw Finnick compared to my other hallucinations, but I still wasn't sure whether to feel happy or sad at my new discovery. The struggle kept me rooted to my spot. The only thing I could be sure of, as usual, was that I wanted to be with Finnick.

So, I called him.

"Finn?" I called. "If you're there, could you please come down here?" I felt a faint tugging sensation in my gut I would not have noticed if I wasn't completely still. It was almost instantaneous, and I felt Finnick's presence before I really saw him.

I can't even explain how he appeared, because it wasn't instantaneous. I simply felt like an empty piece inside of me was filling up until it materialized into my Finnick, perfectly handsome and gorgeous as ever. As much as Finn always looked perfect in my eyes, I could see something was wrong. Finnick lost his light footing on the ground and I reached up and grabbed his shoulders to steady him. There was a light sheen of sweat on his face, which I wiped away.

"Finnick?" I said worriedly, hoping I hadn't done anything to hurt him. Finnick blinked his eyes several times, seeming unsure of where he was, until he focused on me. His lips turned up in the gentle smile I loved so much.

"Hey, Annie," he responded, seeming more alert. I wanted to ask him a thousand questions, yell at him, cry, and kiss him al lat the same time, but I held eveything back. I pushed the strands of Finnick's bronze hair out of his face and looked at him carefully, like any overprotective girl would do to the boy she loved.

"You okay?" I asked softly. Finn had bags under his eyes, like he hadn't been sleeping, altough I had no idea if he even needed sleep. Though I hadn't been looking for anything wrong with Finnick when I thought he was one of my delusions, I knew he couldn't have looked this bad when I saw him before.

"Mhm," Finnick answered me, trying to cover up his wince when I touched what must have been a tender spot on his head. I rested my hand on his chest instead, as if it could slow down his racing heart. Slowly, but surely, Finnick relaxed.

"Sorry," he told me. "Just a bad headache," he said, as if he could just take some medicine and be good as new. I put my arms around his neck and hugged Finnick tightly.

"I'm so sorry I ever doubted you," I said, still holding on.

"You're not allowed to be sorry," Finn said to me. "I would have been really worried if you believed me."

"We are going to figure this out," I took a deep breath before I spoke again. "Then, you can see if you want to stay here or move...on," I said, trying to keep the sadness out of my voice. "You'll probably be much happier wherever you are supposed to go next."

Finnick pulled away enough to look directly into my eyes, still holding me.

"Maybe this is where I'm supposed to be, honey," he said, wiping the lone tear that had escaped my eyes.

Of course, fate had to choose that moment to tear us apart.

The doorknob was being rattled open, with Beetee sure to step inside at any moment. I didn't think he could see Finnick, but that wasn't what mattered to me. I didn't want Beetee to see me with Finnick. It ruined our moments, meant only for us.

As soon as I had turned my head away from Finnick, I realized my mistake. I felt our internal hold on each other break, even if I didn't feel the pain I knew Finnick did as a yell escaped his throat. Finn collapsed, but before I could even move to try to catch him, he was gone. Too soon, too quickly.

Knowing I could not count on controlling myself now, I threw myself under Beetee's desk just before the door opened. It definitely wasn't the most mature of all the choices I've made, but I was instantly glad I was under the desk when I heard a high-pitched female voice speak instead of the deep, masculine one I was expecting.

"...A full report on Odair, now," President Coin was saying. I didn't know why, but something about that girl freaked me out.

"I guess Annie left," Beetee said, looking around for me with a tall glass in his hand. I ducked down further, as if that would stop me from being seen if Boggs or Coin decided to sit down in the chair next to me.

"The poor, crazy thing?" Coin said. "It's a shame," she continued, not waiting for an answer. "She's a pretty girl. We could have used her for the cause if it wasn't for her...condition." She paused for a moment, taking time to walk across the room before turning back to Beetee, who remained politely silent.

"You are sure she isn't faking, Beetee?" Coin asked.

"From what I can tell, Annie has just had too much pressure. Everyone has their limit," he responded. I was glad he called me by name, treating me as a real person. I dismissed him telling Coin I was crazy, even if he wasn't saying it directly. I really did like Beetee.

Apparently, Coin was bored with talking about me.

"So, how did Odair die?" Coin said, without any inflection in her words. I'm going to be honest; I covered my ears so I couldn't hear what Beetee was saying. Yes, I was hiding under a desk with my hands over my ears. I'm very mature.

I started listening again intently when I realized what Coin was saying.

"It would have happened at some point. It is for the best," she said coldly. Beetee cleared his throat.

"What is for the best, President Coin?" Beetee asked, echoing my thoughts, although I would have called her something other than President.

"Don't make me repeat myself," Coin said sharply. "I'm not making any trouble. It is simply a fact that Odair's death will be for the better."

I had to cover my mouth to keep strangled sounds from escaping my throat.

"I need a fresh start. _We_ need a fresh start," she corrected herself. "With Odair gone, we have a clean slate. The people of Thirteen need to stay completely loyal to us as we begin to rule all of Panem," she said, sounding like she had practiced these words before. "I will rule Panem as a world without rebellions, because why would anyone want to rebel from the very people who saved them from the clutches of their darling Capitol?" she sneered. "The deaths of the rebellious victors will eliminate the last of the few people who would dare stand against me."

"You believed Finnick would have turned and fought you?" Beetee asked nervously. "After all you had done for him?"

"Maybe he would have, and maybe not," Coin said smoothly. I was ready to rip out the bitch's throat.

"Either way, it doesn't matter." Coin continued her speech. "I did not have the boy killed, and yet he is dead anyway. Maybe the bread boy will finally snap and attack Katniss Everdeen."

I heard Coin step lightly toward the door to exit, having said her piece.

On her way out, she said, "Oh, Beetee. Don't think you can just let our little conversation become common knowledge," she said coldly, "Or I'll add all of your District 3 buddies to the little _experiment _we planned."

Coin walked out the door, shutting it with a bang. A few seconds later the door shut again, Beetee running in the direction of his room.

I was left under the table, processing what I had just heard.

Finnick. I had to tell Finn. I called his name over and over, praying to feel the tug that meant he was coming. I screamed his name, but nothing happened. I got out from under the table, looking around the room for an explanation, for some reason why he couldn't hear me. There was none, and Finnick never came.

* * *

**Hey, everyone! So sorry for the insanely long delay between chapters. More computer problems, Half the chapter deleted itself. Twice., I have AP tests, etc., etc.**

**But it's the longest chapter so far...**

**Anyways, keep reading and let me know what you think, please!**

**By the way, no, this is not the plot twist. But it's coming... :)**

_~Just an ordinary girl :D_


	7. Separations

**Finnick**

* * *

My eyes opened quickly, and I squinted at the bright light I could never seem to get used to. Where was I? I found myself in a white room, unable to see anything around me but an infinite whiteness. Almost like the ocean.

I felt an emptiness in my stomach that was almost as familiar as it was painful. Ah, the pain. _Be a man, Finnick_, I told myself. _Cut the crap.__  
_

The pain in my head suddenly rocked through my body, and I stopped trying to move. I couldn't feel anything, couldn't hear myself or anyone. If I screamed, the sound didn't reach my ears. Dimly, I felt myself being taken somewhere. I would have sighed in relief if I could move. Please, take me anywhere but here. I silently begged the pain to go away, but then didn't have the energy to think through the blazing agony inside me.

I was surprised to hear the soft sounds of crying. The familiar sound and the knowledge of just _hearing_ something calmed me down, pushing the slightest bit of pain down and away. A shock jolted through me as I realized it wasn't my voice crying. My eyes opened, although I had no memory of ever closing them, and a second shock hit me, much more powerful than the first.

_Annie._

The memories flooded back as they always did, and once again I could continue where our story had left off, as if I had never left. As if I never had to leave.

Annie was sitting up in the bed of our room, crying gently. My heart squeezed at the sight of her, realizing that the time where Annie could move on from her past might never come. Annie's hand moved to her stomach, and her breaths came faster. Unconsciously, she rubbed and patted her belly, soothing the child inside of her while she herself could not be soothed.

The pain in my head suddenly flared and I couldn't help the gasp that escaped from my lips.

"Finnick?" I heard Annie's gentle voice call. "Finn!"

I couldn't see her anymore. Blinking rapidly, I realized I was kneeling on the ground, my hand gripping the hard metal footboard of our bed to keep from collapsing. Dizzily, I looked up to see Annie's blurred figure, her eyes swimming to find contact with mine. I heard her saying things to me, murmuring nonsensical words of comfort. Moments later, I found myself propped up on the bed, Annie's hands purposefully moving over me as she grabbed the material of my shirt.

I realized she must have somehow carried me to the bed. I hazily caught view of her arms, seemingly light and fragile, covering up her true strength. Through my stupor, I felt the corners of my lips turn up in a proud smile. Annie's continued strength never ceased to amaze me.

The smile quickly left as a new pain racked through me. This time, I heard myself yell, the sound echoing around the room. A soft ripping sound followed and I felt cool air stick to my skin as I realized Annie had ripped my shirt open. My chest rose up and down as my breath came quickly, my body searching for stability.

The white of my shirt flashed across my vision before I felt a cool wetness pressed to my forehead. Annie had wet a piece of my shirt and used it as a compress. I knew in District Thirteen, there wasn't anything as wasteful as a washcloth. My smart girl.

It was then I realized just how hot I felt. Slowly, the pain became bearable and I could look at Annie without seeing double. She gave me a small smile, trying not to look worried for my sake.

"I think this is the last time," I said softly, knowing I was right as a fresh sting of pain followed my words.

Annie caressed my face gently, her eyes wise and sad.

"I know, Finn," she told me. She leaned down slowly and kissed me firmly on the lips, her movements slow but sure. "I love you so much," she told me when she broke the kiss. I realized these would be the last words we would say to each other, the last moments we would have together. I had no idea what would come next.

"I love you, too," I said fervently, wishing there was time to show Annie just how much I needed her, how she was my everything.

Of course, that didn't happen.

In the back of my mind, I heard Annie trying to tell me something, something she forgot to say before, but the pain was worse than ever and it wasn't going away. I saw Annie, her eyes pleading, telling me words I couldn't hear. Something snapped, and in that instant I was ripped away from the only thing I ever needed.

* * *

I woke up in the dark, so different from the brightness I was used to. Everything hurt, and I couldn't make one coherent thought.

"Easy, buddy," I heard a voice say, and I was pulled under again.

* * *

**And that's the end of the chapter:)**

**Okay, okay. For those of you who have been following me, please don't kill me! I know it's been months since my last update, and I still love this story so much. As long as someone is reading this, the posts will keep coming, and much faster.**

**I give all of you permission to harass me.**

**PLEASE R&R, so I know this story isn't dead!**

**Suggestions or criticism? Let's hear 'em:)**

**For my new readers, HI:) Thanks for joining the party.**

**BTW, I actually have the next five or six chapters all planned out and outlined, so they're coming, like it or not :P**

_~Just an ordinary girl :D_


	8. Nightmares

**Annie**

* * *

I thought I had stayed calm. Finnick was gone, truly gone. I thought I had acted normally, but people didn't understand. Apparently, my mourning period was over. Apparently, I wasn't supposed to be so upset over Finnick's death. Apparently, I had lost Finnick days ago, rather then right here, in this moment._  
_

I remember hearing voices over my own screaming, shouting to each other. My room was suddenly filled with the sharp and beady eyes of the doctors I hated so much. I guess someone had finally realized that sympathy and _I'm so sorry__ for your loss_ wasn't good enough.

With them was Julian, the only person I had any hopes of calling a friend. It was that traitor who sunk the needle into my arm, dragging me into a deep and drug-induced abyss.

I don't know what they gave me, or how much, but I hated them for it. I hated them because I was out long enough to dream. Except instead of dreaming, I was forced to relive memories. Normally, one would stop before it got too horrible to bear. Normally, I'd wake up screaming in terror before the memory could finish.

What do you think happened this time?

* * *

"You're the only girl left, darling," Calix sneered at me. "You know what all the gentleman say. _Ladies go first._" Calix took a step closer. The twigs snapping under his boot broke through the tense silence and made me shiver involuntarily. My enemy's mouth twisted up in a sadistic grin. He took another step.

"Why don't you just fling yourself off that cliff about a mile back?" Calix taunted. "Or make me a sandwich? Whatever is easier," he added.

Another step forward.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" Calix growled, frustrated that he couldn't bait me. I simply raised my eyebrow at him, and watched him take another step, his spear raised and ready to strike.

"You're a sexist pig?" I offered.

Calix's face turned to shock and even fear as the rope I had so carefully placed caught around his foot and hauled him up into my trap, his spear falling from his outstretched hands. Calix was entangled in a sea of webbed net, struggling to break free.

Breccan stepped out from behind the tree behind me, smiling.

"I'm a little hurt," he said mockingly, "that you didn't need my help at all!" I smiled back at him, then turned my attention to a flailing Calix. I walked up the the net and put my face right in his.

"I'll let another tribute have the pleasure of killing you," I said simply, then turned around and left with feigned disinterest. I looked over my shoulder to find Breccan tailing me, Calix's spear in his hand.

The two of us made camp for the night, nestling into a little hideout we made out of twigs and brambles. From the outside, our temporary home looked like a shrub that had survived the rough storms plaguing the arena. Tonight, however, there were clear skies. I knew better than to the think the Gamemakers were just giving us a break. It was a warning, a sign of things to come. Breccan knew it too.

"Tomorrow is going to be a rough day," he said seriously. His eyes were clouded with the worry he was trying to hide from me, but it's surprising how well you get to know a guy when everyone else around is trying to brutally murder you.

Before the arena, I had only seen Breccan's face a few times at town or by the ocean. He was two years older than me, so we never had any classes together. Now, I was used to seeing Breccan's face every day, every second, and I couldn't help but wonder how much longer that would last. Again, Breccan knew where my thoughts were going even before I did, but he was the only one who had the courage to voice them.

"So," he started, "we know that both tributes are gone from all districts except One, Two, Six, Seven, and, of course, Four," he said, with a small smile at the mention of our survival. "Calix is from One, the pointy-haired guy from two, Roth is still hiding out somewhere, and I'm not really sure about the kid from Seven." Breccan put up a finger for each tribute he rattled off his list.

"That makes five, maybe six, tributes left." I calculated.

"Glad to know you're brain functions enough for some addition," Breccan joked, his eyes lighting around the edges before they weighed down in seriousness. "I think we need to have _the talk_," he said, but we burst into giggles once more, avoiding the conversation we dreaded.

"I'm not leaving you," he said solemnly, surprising me. I mean, Breccan and I had had each other's backs throughout the games, but I didn't expect him to stick around when it got closer to the end. He didn't owe me anything. In fact, he'd saved my life much more than I had ever helped his. Later, I would wonder if Breccan had ever felt something for me, because I wasn't able to explain his choice in any other way.

"I'm not going to turn on you, either," he teased lightly when I hadn't said anything.

"Same goes for me," I said. And that was it. There was no drama, no confession of mad love for each other. We simply took each other's word and put our lives in one another's hands.

That would always be Breccan's biggest mistake.

Finnick rewarded us with an entire loaf of District 4 bread, tinted its familiar green and salted to perfection. It was a feast, and I knew how much it must have cost Finnick to give it to us. I tried my best not to dwell on the ways he got me and Breccan sponsors, because I knew and I understood why he had to do it. I just really, really didn't like it.

I reached up into the sharp branches and leaves, revealing our secret spot where we hid the few things we had to hold on to. I grabbed the tattered piece of white cloth, my token in this hell. I held on to it tightly, pressing it to my face and inhaling deeply, ignoring the look of sympathy Breccan gave me every time I did this.

The cloth was a piece of Finnick's shirt, dipped in sea water and dried in the warm sun. It smelled of my ocean, my home, and my one true love. Yes, I might be corny, but I'm allowed to be a little sentimental after three weeks in this death trap. I refused to cry, afraid my salty tears would replace the salt of the ocean. I took a deep breath, calming myself.

When I glanced over, I saw that Breccan had turned away to eat his bread, giving me privacy. I sighed, knowing I would never stop owing this boy, who was too sweet to ever deserve this terrible fate. Although Breccan was older than me, he still had a youthful innocence that the Games were just dying to strip away. I had heard from many people that I, too, had a similar quality, but if I did, I was sure it must have been gone by now.

I looked down at my token, knowing that I would try my hardest to make it back to Finn and my family. I silently prayed that Breccan would become Victor if I didn't make it. I tucked the cloth safely away, allowing myself to picture Finn's perfect face one last time. Just imagining his quirky smile, his bright, sea green eyes, and his tousled bronze hair brought a bittersweet smile to my face. Then, I buried his image and my thoughts of him away with my token, refusing to contaminate my memories of Finnick with the cruelty of the Games.

I volunteered to take first watch, not failing to notice Breccan's struggle to keep himself awake and alert. He smiled at me gratefully and was out like a light.

Usually, Breccan and I rotate keeping watch every few hours, but I wanted to let Breccan get his sleep and be refreshed for tomorrow's events, which were sure to be eventful. We couldn't leave the darling people of the Capitol without their barbaric entertainment, now could we? Also, letting Breccan sleep was my way of thanking him for everything he had done for me. I knew that, if it wasn't for him, I would have been out of the Games a long time ago.

That was my biggest mistake. Actually, no. I was the one who fell asleep on watch. _That_ was my biggest mistake. Being forced to watch the Games my entire life, I knew that falling asleep during watch meant death was on its way. If only I was so lucky.

I woke up to the sounds of twigs snapping. Confusion from still being half asleep immediately turned to alarm. I was awake in the next second, my hands around the knife I kept beside me, but no one was there. I sighed in relief, scanning the perimeter before I let myself relax. _We are still safe. We are okay_, I told myself. Looking down, I saw the bread Breccan and I had feasted on last night. I broke one of my slices in half, saving the last of it for Breccan in case he had eaten more of his bread than he should have. I silently cursed myself for falling asleep, then cursed out loud when I heard a strangled yell.

I whirled around. Breccan had appeared from the trees behind me, instead of sleeping in our hideaway. The first lights of the new day were just appearing in the sky, but I knew right away who was behind Breccan, holding him in a choke hold so tightly his face was turning purple.

"I'm going to kill you!" I screamed at Calix, my knife gripped tightly in my hand. He just winked at me, laughing off my threat like we were playing a game. Maybe that's really all this was to him, but I couldn't breathe. Breccan couldn't speak anymore. He had used all his energy to warn _me_ about Calix, to give me a chance to run. There was no time to cry or to share last words with Breccan, the boy who had saved me so many times. The world took on a new dizzying light as I watched Breccan die. Everything spun, and I knew there wasn't enough time for me to save him. There was never enough time.

Breccan and I locked eyes. I looked into his deep blue eyes, seeing sadness and something else, but not anger. He wasn't angry with me for making the dumbest mistake in the world, for costing him his life. That just wasn't Breccan. I realized he thought I still had a chance of survival, but I also knew he had put too much faith in me already. I hoped Breccan saw in my eyes everything I wanted to say, but I wasn't even sure what that was.

With a calm and almost peaceful expression, Calix drew a long and pointed sword from behind him, and, in one fluid motion, drew back his arm and sliced the sword roughly across Breccan. I heard the thud of his head hitting the ground, hardly seeing it through my dizziness. My eyes were still locked on his blue ones, staring into nothing.

I forced myself to face Calix, tearing myself away from the head, unable to look at it or the body it was now disconnected from. Those _things_ weren't Breccan, not anymore. I didn't realize I had been screaming, but now I heard the words I must have been repeating over and over.

"The head! The head! You cut off the head!"

Calix hesitated, seeming almost confused, but the expression vanished as a taunting sneer took it's place.

"Hell yeah, I did!" He yelled. That was it.

I ran at Calix, flinging myself at him, trying to hurt him in any way possible. The ground shook, and nothing made sense, but I punched and kicked and flailed everywhere until I felt myself make contact with skin.

Suddenly, Calix was gone. I stood up and tried to run, but couldn't. I finally looked down, surprised to feel a liquid spreading through me. Had Calix stabbed me? I stopped treading water for a moment, not realizing that I had been in the first place, and was swept up in a violent current.

My submerged under the water, and I opened my eyes beneath the murky sea, I couldn't see much besides my blurry hands in front of me. Why was I swimming in the ocean? I thought that maybe, just maybe, I was back home. Finnick was waiting for me by the shore with a net full of sea bass and a pair of arms to hold me. With difficulty, I managed to break the surface of the water, coughing and gasping for air.

"Finnick?" I called. Where was he? I couldn't see the shore from here. "Finn!" Instead of seeing Finnick, I saw Calix. Actually, I saw several Calix's. They were all swimming around, trying to float. I laughed out loud. Didn't all the Calix's know it was natural to float? It felt so good...

"Finn?" I asked one more time before realizing my mistake. "Shit!" I screamed, tears mixing with the swirling ocean and becoming just another part of the water. I had let Finnick into the Games. I ruined him, the very thing I swore never to do. "I'm sorry, baby," I whispered. It was all too easy to see his face, so angry with me for giving away our secret. It was the only time I could ever think of Finnick mad at me. "I'm sorry!" I yelled to nobody. Well, nobody but the Calix's. I think they were laughing at me.

"Shut up!" I yelled to one, swinging my hand to punch him. Calix disappeared before I ever touched him. I was confused, but my spinning mind didn't want to make sense of things, so I stopped trying.

I took another swing at a Calix, then reached for another. I spun and spun, trying to make Calix pay for what he had done, but I could never quite catch him. "Damn it!" I yelled, but the Calix's didn't hear me. I splashed at the water when it turned evil, trying to suck me to the bottom of the ocean. The Calix's were having a hard time fighting the water too.

"You promised!" they all yelled in unison. I tried to look at all of them at the same time, tried to ask what I dared promise any of the filthy scumbags. The Calix's weren't looking at me, though. They seemed to be looking...up? I looked at the angry sky storm clouds and smiled. I thanked them for making the Calix's angry, I thanked them very much.

All together, the Calix's went down, down, down to sleep in the water. Suddenly, I wanted to be there too. It wasn't fair that they got to go by themselves, while I was stuck in this dizzy, confusing, terrible world.

My arms stopped working. I would have thanked them, too, because I was so tired, but my lips weren't moving either. That was okay. I floated beneath the pretty water, and it was happy. I didn't even have time to whisper to Finnick, sitting on the shore. This way, I wouldn't hurt him any more. My eyes didn't close, but the world turned dark and I felt myself being washed away with it.

* * *

I was in a bed, IV's poking in and out of me, doctors pushing and prodding. Sometimes the doctors I saw were the Capitol doctors from my dream. Other times, I was conscious enough to see Thirteen's doctors tending to me, believing they were helping me by giving me more drugs.

"We got her just in time," said the Capitol doctors in my dream.

"I don't think I'd be handling it very well, either!" said Julian from somewhere close to me. He sounded like he was arguing.

"She needs more fluids," a Thirteen doctor said.

"It's such a shame we didn't actually _see_ that Breccan boy die!" said a hairstylist I once knew, buried deep inside my memory. "I can't believe the Gamemakers chose _that_ moment to cut to the footage of the dam breaking!"

"It's alright," said another one of my stylists. "Annie will just have to be a dear and tell us all about it."

"I'm right here, honey. It's going to be okay." Finnick pleaded, but I knew Finnick wasn't here, and I wouldn't answer to a man who broke his promises.

_Help me_, I tried to say, but the drugs weren't done with me yet. Crying for Breccan became crying for Finnick, and I lost sense of what was a dream, what was reality, and what was something else entirely. Finally, just as it had happened before, I forgot what was up, down left, right, anything.

I gave up, letting the nightmares become reality and take me away.

* * *

**That's it for now:)**

**What did you guys think of Breccan and Calix? The more I wrote about Breccan, the more I wished he didn't have to die:(**

**Let me know what you thought of Annie's past!**

****Also, I'd use the new image feature on the site to make covers for this story, but I'm really not much of an artist. If anyone would like to make any drawings or images, that would be so cool and I'd add them to my story and owe you forever:) (Finnick, Annie, Breccan, Calix, Julian, etc., etc.) If you're interested, let me know in that big box below!****

**Thanks for reading!**

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_


	9. Realities

**Finnick**

* * *

I heard the sound of muffled voices as I floated to the surface of consciousness. Sharp pains in my head spiked and spread through the rest of my body, and I heard myself moan softly.

"Shut up!" a voice whispered harshly, but I wasn't really awake yet. I felt myself moving around, my body trying desperately to assess the situation while my mind could not. I felt a cold, hard surface beneath me, and then a rough kick to my aching ribs.

"Damn it, cut it out!" A hand covered my mouth and I struggled to open my eyes. For a second, all I saw was blue, but as my eyes focused in the dark, I realized the girl who was lying on top of me had blue hair. It hung from her face and lay on my chest as her face loomed over mine.

I didn't struggle at first, because, in all honesty, I was no stranger to this position. Under normal circumstances, this would be the part where I kiss the girl's neck, and she rips my clothes off like a kid ripping the wrapping paper off a Christmas present. But I rationalized that this was not a normal circumstance because two things were very different:

A) My clothes were already gone. My bare chest was covered in a sheen of sweat, but not a shirt. Oh, and let's not forget-

B) The blue-haired girl was holding a giant needle over her head, aimed over my heart.

I started fighting her then. I tried to throw her off me, but I was weak and the girl more than capable of holding me down.

"Hold...still!" she grumbled, accidentally squirting a drop of the clear liquid out of the syringe. I bit her hand roughly and felt the taste of blood in my mouth. The blue-haired girl cursed loudly, but didn't let go. I felt the sharp prick of the needle as she managed to jab the syringe into my neck.

The pressure on me was released as the girl rolled off of me and leaned against the wall next to us. She held her injured hand up, examining the damage.

"Shit!" she snapped, obviously not happy with the fresh bite marks cut into the palm of her hand.

I tried to get up, or at least throw a few punches, but my arms and legs felt too heavy. I glared at the blue-haired girl, ready to make a witty comment about biting things, but my mouth wouldn't move. A buzz was growing in my ears and my gaze was unfocused.

I felt a firm pat on the cheek as I heard the girl say, "You're a little spitfire, now aren't you-"

She broke off suddenly, reacting to something outside the room. I tried to focus on what she was saying, but it seemed like too much effort to catch more than a few glimpses of a conversation not meant for me.

"No, you can't come..."

"Promise you'll dye your skin..."

"Mom, if you don't get..."

"Calissa, President Snow orders us to..."

Somewhere, a door slammed shut. The sound echoed in my head, and I flinched away. My breathing had slowed, my chest moving slowly up and down. My muddled mind clouded, and all the fight drained out of me.

Blue swam into my vision, and I felt hands, more gentle this time, push my hair back from my face. Unable to think too deeply into anything, I found comfort in the light touch.

"You're welcome," said the blue-haired girl. She picked up tools I couldn't make sense of and pressed some buttons. "It doesn't hurt so much now, does it?"

Through my numb haziness, I realized the pain had subsided. My eyes closed on their own, exhaustion taking over. I knew that the girl was doing something to me because there were pricks on my arms and legs every few minutes, but I was just glad the pain was gone.

* * *

"Calissa, dinner!"

"I'm not hungry!" yelled the girl working over me. My eyes opened, and I realized I had fallen asleep. Slowly, I turned my head, looking around. I was on the floor of a small bedroom, hidden behind the bed. There were posters of the seventy third Hunger Games everywhere. Scattered across dressers were necklaces and piles of shiny clothes tossed aside carelessly. That's when I knew I was in the Capitol.

I lay quietly on the floor as the memories that had escaped me under the haze of drugs returned. I remembered the sewers, I remembered death, and I remembered seeing Annie. I pushed it all away for a moment and looked up. My eyes caught the gaze of the blue-haired girl, who I assumed was Calissa. She started talking before I could, unconsciously rubbing her newly bandaged hand as she spoke.

"The stuff I gave you won't be so strong now, so you can actually think and stuff. I didn't mean to give you the whole dose, but you were being so damn uncooperative. I wouldn't move too much if I were you, by the way," she said, anticipating my moves.

"If I knew you'd be so much trouble, I might not have saved your life. Your'e welcome," she added. "That's twice now I've said that and zero times you've thanked me for my heroism. I've gotta say, Finnick O'dair, you're not the golden boy everyone says you are."

My head spun from concentrating on Calissa, and I could tell by the smirk on her face she was enjoying this.

"Katniss..." I croaked. "Peeta... Are they-"

"They're all fine. Still on the run."

"Calissa-" I started, my voice strained and barely audible, but I didn't get any farther than that. Calissa cut me off with a glare as sharp as a dagger.

"I'm Callie. I'll kill you if you call me Calissa, and I'll do a better job than those stupid lizard muttations." She must have seen the look on my face because she seemed satisfied and kept talking.

"Oh yeah, I know all about them. You are quite the hype right now, Finn. Is it cool if I call you that, or does it make you too homesick?" Everything Callie said was dripping in sarcasm and her weird Capitol accent. She turned on a light overhead, and I looked more closely at her.

Callie was obviously younger than me, still in her rebellious teenage years. Her hair was an electric blue, and she was wearing something shiny and silver that was supposed to resemble clothing. At first glance, her skin seemed normal, but it was just the slightest shade off to know it wasn't natural. I swallowed my disgust at the sight of Callie, completely immersed in Capitol life, and took a look at myself.

I dimly realized Callie had kept my boxers on me, but I wouldn't have recognized myself if I hadn't, well, known I was attached to my body. Every inch of me was covered in cuts and bruises. My torso was a shade of green turning into a deep purple. I gingerly touched my fingers to my neck, where they traced a deep cut that ran diagonally from the base of my jaw to my left shoulder. I could tell from the weird pressure on my head that it must have gotten banged up too.

"How?" I whispered in shock.

"How, what?," Callie sneered. "You'll have to be a little more specific. How did you live? How did I so graciously rescue you? How unattractive do you look right now?"

"The first two," I said, slowly but surely getting my voice back.

"I found you outside the grate of a sewer. Pipes had broken from some sort of explosion and water was flowing out the hole where the grate was. It looks like you climbed out in time, and I was hoping you could fill me in on the rest. Between you and me, I wouldn't have waited until _after_ the flood to find a nicer place to sleep at night."

Concentrating, I dimly remembered Katniss screaming 'nightlock' into the Holo. That must have caused the explosion. I caught flashes in my mind of rushing water and swimming with a raging current. I looked at my cut hands and saw the imprint of the grate I had clung to for survival.

"I pulled myself out," I said, more for my own benefit than Callie's.

"Seems like it," she sound, sounding impressed, "but it almost killed you. If that cut on your neck had gone any deeper, your head would still be at the bottom of that nasty sewer."

"Thank you, Callie." I don't know what she expecting my response to be, but it wasn't that. She quickly recovered, though.

"Well, it's about time I get some credit!" she complained, but I could tell she didn't help me out for the glory.

"Why?"

"Why, what-" Callie started, but I realized my mistake and quickly cut her off.

"Why did you help me?" Her eyes changed for a moment, considering what to say to me.

"That's not information you need to know," she said coldly, her eyes hard.

"I took you back here, but I didn't know if you'd make it. My mom is the top cosmetic surgeon in the Capitol," she said proudly. "I used a lot of her tools to fix you up, and then I just hoped you would actually wake up."

"How long have I been out?" I asked, thinking back to Annie. Had everything that happened been one confusing dream?

"Tonight's you're third night in my bed! Well, you've been on the floor," Callie teased, but then her face turned serious. "It was pretty touch and go. I think you were comatose; you were so gone, you could have been in another world."

Somehow, Callie's confirmation only heightened the feeling that what had happened was real, that Annie was still waiting for me back home. I didn't know how it was possible, but I only hoped Annie could tell I was okay. I thought back to our bedroom, where we had said rushed goodbyes. Was she alright?

"From what I know, she's still hidden in Thirteen," Callie said, and that's when I realized I had been saying Annie's name out loud.

"Thank you," I said again, my voice shaking with emotion. I could go home to Annie and our child, my family. "I owe you my life."

"Don't get all serious and brooding on me!" Callie said in disgust. "What happened to that sassy Finnick O'dair who was loved by the Capitol?"

"Is that why you saved me? For my wit and sass?" I said jokingly, but curiosity burned underneath me. Cassie's mother sounded very successful, and Callie didn't seem like she hated the Capitol and its customs. What reason did she have to save me? She had everything to lose and nothing to gain.

"And because it would be really fun for my mom to catch me with the man-whore of Panem hidden in my bedroom!" Cassie replied, laughing. She didn't notice my face blanch when she mentioned my not-so-voluntary extracurricular activities, but I knew she didn't mean it.

"My mom doesn't exactly know you're here," she added. "It's in your best interest that you keep it that way." I nodded, then gasped as a quick pain filled me and the haze of drugs ebbed away. Cassie studied me carefully, more like a doctor consulting her patient than a teenage girl.

"Don't bite me again," she warned, getting a new syringe and filling it with the strange liquid. I didn't want to sleep again, afraid i wouldn't wake up, but Callie shook her head slightly.

"You're still pretty banged up," she said. "The faster I can fix you up, the faster you can get back to your crazy girlfriend."

"She's not crazy," I defended Annie as I felt the prick of the needle on my arm. I thought I saw a look of sympathy on Callie's face, but the drugs were stong and my eyes were already unfocused.

"Okay," she whispered, but I might have imagined that too.

"And she's my wife," I added.

_And I'm going back to her_. The drugs washed over my mind and I let a peaceful sleep wash over me.

* * *

**That's the end! What do you guys think of the twist?**

**I couldn't let him stay dead:(**

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_~Just an ordinary girl :D_


	10. Letters

**Annie**

* * *

I was quietly roaming the empty halls of Thirteen, passing room after room of sleeping people. My hands shook slightly as I walked, my body adjusting to a balance after all the sedatives I had been given.

I knew it was early in the morning and that if there were windows to look out of, there would be no sun. I was glad to walk around without anyone examining or staring at me. My mind was still a little numb, enough to let me block out the sadness that could easily drown me. I looked at the walls, hoping to see designs or pictures that could distract me from my own thoughts, but there was nothing in Thirteen that wasn't absolutely necessary for survival.

"Hey, Annie."

"Finn?" I cried, whirling around in the direction of the voice. Julian had appeared, and he saw my disappointment that my dead husband wasn't the one greeting me.

"Hey," I said to Julian, hoping to cover up my mistake before I could dwell on it too much. Graciously, Julian didn't press me about it. He also didn't ask me how I'd managed to escape from my bed in the infirmary.

"I thought I'd find you here," was all he said. I didn't say anything and continued walking down the hall. Julian was the closest thing I had to a friend here, but I didn't want to see him right now.

"You're angry with me. It wasn't my idea to drug you," he said, but I didn't feel any better. He was the one who had knocked me out; I remembered that much. The memories of my Hunger Games were still fresh in my mind, and it was all his fault.

"Between you and me," Julian whispered, "I only gave you _half_ of what the doctors gave me. I convinced them to let me give it to you and then squirted some of that stuff out while they weren't looking." I stopped walking for a second, and Julian took that opportunity to get in front of me, looking me straight in the eyes.

"I'm sorry," he pleaded. "I didn't know they were going to strap you to the bed like some...animal." His teeth were gritted, and I knew he meant what he said, but I couldn't help being so upset.

Since the Games, I'd been practically attached to an IV, always drugged and never able to really feel. Nobody could understand what that felt like without experiencing it. Before I knew better, I took my thoughts and feeling for granted. I took reality for granted. Sometimes I wondered if the doctors drugged me so that they wouldn't have to deal with the trouble of fixing me. How was I supposed to ever know what was real when narcotics took away that ability?

"They kept giving me more," I said, my voice breaking.

"I stopped it as quickly as I could, I swear," Julian pleaded. "You know I would never let them do it to you on purpose, not when I know how it feels."

It was true. I'd forgotten for a minute that Julian was one of the few people who could relate to me. Julian was one of the lucky few who had escaped their districts in hopes of finding Thirteen. Back then, the idea of Thirteen surviving in the face of the Capitol was more of a way to hold on to hope than a real chance at freedom.

I didn't know the whole story, but I knew enough. Julian's friend was wanted by Capitol, and he had convinced her to run with him and look for Thirteen. For whatever reason, the Capitol really didn't want her to get here. They found the two of them on the outskirts of Thirteen, and Julian almost died trying to save her. Peacekeepers took her and left him for dead.

Someone found Julian during one of the security checks and medics were able to save his life, but I heard he was hysterical for weeks. He blamed himself for his friend's evident death and had to be sedated for weeks so that his body could heal properly.

"I'm sorry," I said softly, and I wasn't only talking about being angry with him.

"I know," he said to me. "I just need you to know I'm on your side."

"You're supposed to be watching me, aren't you?" I guessed.

"Actually," Julian started, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "I'm supposed to make sure you don't try to get out of your bed," he admitted. "I'm not doing so well, am I?"

I smiled a little, and Julian seemed happy to see it. We started walking back down the hall in a comfortable silence.

"I trust you," I finally said, and I meant it. "I'm on your side, too." Julian smiled then, lighting up his face. Julian's smile was all teeth and spread across his face. I couldn't help but compare it to Finn's traditional lopsided grin.

Just like that, I missed Finnick more than anything. Julian must have seen something change on my face, because he stopped and turned to me.

"Promise me you'll find your way back to your bed before sunrise?" I nodded, and Julian understandingly let me deal with my grief alone. Of course, my mind wouldn't let me be alone.

I was slowly walking toward the hospital wing, when I heard a woman's voice. I stiffened, recognizing it instantly.

"Annie, you need to eat your food now, sweetie."

_No, not now_, I thought. I didn't want to see her right now.

"Warren, you can play with the seashells later," she said. "Please come eat at the table."

"Mom, please stop," I whispered, but it didn't make a difference.

Standing in front of me was my mother, only I knew it wasn't really her. Her light brown hair, turned blonde from the sun, wasn't real. The loving look she had in her eyes as she gazed at me wasn't real either. Nothing about her was real. I wanted to hug her and hold her and tell her how much I wished she was here, but I couldn't do that. I'd tried to touch her before, and she had just vanished.

"The sooner you eat, honey, the sooner Finnick can come over," said my mother. This hallucination was a memory. I knew that Finnick _would_ come over later that day, to comfort me when I heard that my mother and brother had died.

This was my last day with my family.

"Warren, I'm not going to ask you again," my mom scolded lightly, but there was no anger in her voice, only love.

"I'm begging you, Mom!" I cried. "I don't want to see him! Please, just go away!" It was too late.

My brother bounced into existence, his face bright with happiness and joy. He was too young to really understand what the Games were, and so Warren's biggest concern in his world was finding the perfect seashell. I knew that he had had one curled in his hand that day. I wanted to warn them both, tell them to run, but I knew I couldn't change the past.

"Let us be thankful we are together and safe," my mom said, her hands clasped in prayer. "I am thankful to have your father watching over and protecting us, and I am thankful to have the best children in the world." Tears streamed down my face, and I shut my eyes tight, hoping the hallucinations would go away. They didn't.

"Nothing can tear us apart," she continued, and it seemed like my mom was speaking directly to me, daring me to prove her wrong.

"I am so sorry, Mom. I can never tell you how sorry I am."

"Nuh-tin," Warren echoed, staring up at me with his dimples and baby blue eyes.

"Nothing," my mom said again, and it seemed like my world went on repeat as only one word echoed through my mind.

_Nothing._

_Nothing._

_Nothing._

Just like nothing would ever tear me and Finnick apart.

I screamed, running forward and away from my family. My breaths came in quick gasps, and I stopped moving. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying desperately to get back to reality.

"Hey," a voice said.

"What now?" I yelled frantically, expecting another dead person to appear.

I looked up and realized I had run back to the infirmary. Johanna was sitting up in her bed watching me, but if she was freaked out by my sudden jump into Crazyland, she didn't show it. I looked around for Mom and Warren, but they had vanished.

"It will get better," she told me solemnly. "Pretty soon you'll be too numb to care too much about anything." I almost told Johanna I didn't want to be numb, but thought better of it. Maybe it really was the better option.

"But you also can't give up," Johanna said with more fierceness than I think she meant to. Her face softened a bit, and she gestured for me to sit down on my bed beside hers. I'd never seen this side of her before, and I didn't quite know how to react. She eyed me, seeing my hesitation.

"Well, I'm not going to freaking bite you," she said sharply, sounding more like the Johanna I'd come to sort of know and more often avoid.

We sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes. Johanna seemed to be thinking of words to say, but I didn't want to wait until I started having conversations with myself for her to speak up.

"Where is Katniss's sister?" I asked, trying to think of something to say. The little girl was usually up making the rounds at night, checking on us when she thought we were asleep. I suspected she had more sleeping trouble herself than she let on. We had talked a few times here and there, and she was always nothing but kind.

"Don't know," was Johanna's response. "I heard Coin wanted her a few hours ago."

"Oh."

"Yup."

We sat like that for another minute until Johanna reached under her pillow and grabbed a knife. I jumped when I saw its sharp point glint in the low lighting, but Johanna just gave me a dismissive look.

She pulled on the base of the knife until a piece came off and stuck her fingers inside what seemed like a hidden compartment. In her hands was a piece of paper, crumpled and torn with very faint writing. I tried to peer inconspicuously at the words written on the paper, but Johanna snatched it away from my sight.

"I went through a lot of trouble to hold on to this," Johanna said carefully. "I trust you will take care of it?" I nodded, still having no idea what could be on that paper.

"I kept this to remind me why we can never give up," she added. "I think that, right now, you need it more that I do."

Johanna handed me the brittle paper. I held in gently between two fingers, afraid any sudden movement might cause the paper to fall apart. Johanna turned on her side and curled up to go back to sleep.

"Never stop fighting," she murmured sleepily over her shoulder. I wasn't paying attention. As soon as I had a clear glance at the paper, my body froze and my heart raced.

It was in Finnick's handwriting. I could tell he had been writing in a hurry; his words were sprawled across the page and slanted to the right. Slowly, I focused letter and forced myself to read Finnick's words.

_-READ IN CONFIDENCE-_

_J,_

_You must be getting a little __desperate to have to keep begging for my help, huh? I've been thinking about what you said, and I was about to tell you no again. I was going to threaten you in some elaborate way and tell you to leave me and Annie alone, but then I realized that nobody would ever leave us alone. I guess I'd rather give in to you before someone even more annoying tries to persuade me._

_I'm doing this for her, Jo. I look at Annie and everything the Games have taken from her, from the both of us, and I know that hiding is not an option anymore. It never was. They will keep coming for us. __Somehow, you've convinced me that fighting is better than doing nothing. The coming war is inevitable, and if the Capitol wins, we will lose what little we have left. Besides, if we die, there will be no more sex, and that's just a shame._

_Annie's my one condition. She will have no involvement in any of this. I don't care what the cost is, that's my price. If it means saving Annie, I'll carry out the rebellion with you during the Quarter Quell._

_Besides, the Capitol isn't getting rid of me that easily._

_Be careful, and never give up._

_~F_

I continued to stare at Finnick's letter, but I wasn't reading the words on the page. Even before the rebellion had actually begun, Finnick was trying to protect _me_. I read the part where he told Johanna that doing nothing wasn't good enough anymore, and I knew he was right. I could see why Johanna had saved the letter, which captured every aspect of Finnick, from his mind to his heart. I heard his determination and felt his pain. I laughed when he attempted to make jokes; he always tried to lift everyone's spirits.

I tucked the letter underneath my pillow for safekeeping and lay down. I decided that I had to take action. I refused to sit and wait for news to come, like a helpless little girl. I closed my eyes, determined to make the choices Finnick would have been drawn towards and to be brave like him.

As I drifted to sleep, I thought again about one thing Finn had written in his letter.

_Besides, the Capitol isn't getting rid of me that easily._

I couldn't help hoping that, somehow, Finnick was still out there fighting. If he was, I would find him.

I would fight with him.

* * *

**That's it! I was too excited to wait until I hit 50 reviews:P**

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**By the way, if it isn't obvious, I (sadly) do not own the Hunger Games or anything awesome like that.**

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_


	11. Blasts

**Finnick**

* * *

"Calissa!"

I found myself being pushed under Callie's bed as her mom opened the door to her bedroom. Callie looked up and walked toward her mother, hopefully hiding the mounds of supplies hidden behind her bed.

"Get out, Mom!" Callie screamed.

"I thought I could dye your skin blue today, to match your hair? I have an opening-"

"Out!"

It took a little more pouting and whining on Callie's part, but eventually her mom left and our secret was safe. Callie slammed her door shut, and I carefully crawled out from under the bed.

"That was close," Callie said blankly. "You better learn to get under the bed faster."

"I was asleep!" I answered.

"Excuses, excuses," Callie muttered. She walked around her bed and came to sit next to me. Her hands sifted through a box of her mom's cosmetic tools before she pulled out something sharp and pointy.

"No way," I objected as she held the metal object up menacingly. Callie laughed at me, and then pointed the sharp end of the tool at my leg. I felt moist air spray against my leg. Callie raised an eyebrow at me.

"Calm down, Golden Boy," she smirked. "It's airbrush." I looked down at my leg and saw what Callie was doing. Where there had been a mixture of green and purple bruises, now all I could see was smooth and tanned skin.

"I know the color is still a little off, but nobody will question that here." Callie went back to work, not waiting for my response. I watched in fascination as I slowly transformed from a dead man into the Capitol's favorite prostitute.

I tried to hide my discomfort as Callie worked over me. I felt like I was preparing to go into the next Games, being forced to look perfect for death. I realized that's exactly what I was doing. The war was still going on around me, and while I couldn't deny that I was still too banged up to fight, I knew I had to get back in it as soon as possible.

"I need to get back," I murmured, more to myself than Callie, but, as usual, she had an answer for me.

"No shit, buddy," she snapped. "I'm not doing this for fun."

"Why are you doing this again?" I asked. "I can't remember what your reason was," I said smugly. I could be sarcastic, too.

"There's the Golden Boy we all know and love! I was wondering where you went," Callie replied smoothly.

"I've been a little busy lately, sorry."

"Having too much fun with the ladies? Wait, it's the other way around, isn't it?"

"At least I can get some action," I fired back at her.

"I saved your ass."

"You kissed my ass," I said, laughing.

"Yeah, while you were sleeping."

"That's disgusting, I haven't showered in about a month."

"Golden Boy," Callie yelled.

"Blue Girl," I responded.

"That wasn't very creative, you know."

"I'm much better at arts and crafts."

We both burst out laughing, unable to continue our banter any longer. I let Callie finish covering up my bruises. We sat in a comfortable silence for a few minutes. Callie concentrated on the makeup, and I tried to come up with a plan to get back to Katniss, the rest of the team, and my Annie.

"You're not so bad, Golden Boy," Callie admitted.

"Funny, I actually get that a lot," I told her. Callie finished covering my face with the spray and held up a mirror for me to see her work. I looked absolutely normal now, and it was time to go help.

"You're not ready to go out there yet," Callie said, reading my mind.

"I have to-"  
"No," she cut me off. "You don't have to do anything. If you go out there, you won't be any help to anyone. You can barely walk, Finnick." Callie said my real name like it stopped the conversation from going any further, but I didn't take orders from anyone.

I used my hands to help pull myself up. I stood up shakily, but quickly felt myself falling back to the floor. Callie reached out to steady me, a victorious smirk on her face. I propped myself up by leaning on her bed, frustrated.

"Help me start walking around, then," I said. "Please," I added, almost forgetting how much Callie was sacrificing for me. I just knew I had to help my team before something terrible happened.

Callie grabbed my hand and helped me walk around the room. As much as I didn't want to, I swallowed my pride and allowed myself to lean on her strong shoulders as I limped around. Slowly, I was able to move more easily as the muscles I hadn't used in days were forced to work. It was rough and painful, but after a few hours, I could walk around without any help.

"I feel like you're a baby taking his first steps," Callie smirked. "Should I congratulate you?" She was teasing me, but I couldn't help grinning. I was so glad to finally be getting my strength back.

"She's a lucky girl. Annie,' Callie clarified. "You'd do anything for her, wouldn't you?" I looked at Callie closely and saw a strange expression on her face. Her gaze was far away, and I knew she was in a memory, thinking of another time and place.

"Absolutely," I said firmly. "That's why I need to get back out there as soon as I can." Callie gave me a silent nod but didn't say anything. I suddenly felt a strong wave of protection for Callie, a teenage girl who might be from the Capitol, but was obviously like the rest of us too. I wanted to know what pain she had experienced, what it was that had made her different from the rest of the _them_.

"Callie," I said softly. "Why did you save me?" I questioned. When she didn't answer, I asked the more important question.

"What happened to you?"

Callie looked at me, her usually fierce brown eyes vulnerable for just a moment. She took a breath, and I waited to hear her story. I think she would have told it to me, too. Of course, it was at that very moment that everything went wrong.

Footsteps came closer to the bedroom, and I threw myself under Callie's bed. I couldn't help groan as my bruised body hit the floor, but I clamped my mouth shut immediately. Silently cursing, I wondered if I was born with the curse of terrible timing.

I thought that Callie's mom was the only one coming into the room, but I quickly realized something was wrong when Callie didn't start yelling and whining.

"What's going on?" came Callie's voice, soft and maybe even a little scared.

"It's just protocol," came a gruff voice. "You are to come with us now."

I froze, realizing we were caught. Callie had risked everything to save me, and now she was going to lose everything. I put my hands on the floor and got ready to push myself out from under the bed. If I was fast enough, maybe I'd be able to knock out the Peacekeeper here for Callie before he realized what was going on. Just before I could jump out, I felt a sharp pressure on my hand. I looked quickly to my side and saw that Callie had deliberately stepped on my hand, her foot out of sight of the Peacekeeper.

_Don't move_, was Callie's silent warning to me. It took all of my willpower not to jump out and grab the Peacekeeper in a choke hold, but I forced myself to stay under the bed.

"Why?" Callie asked, and I heard the stubbornness in her voice as she spoke. So did the Peacekeeper. I heard footsteps from the hall come into Callie's room. I peered under the bed and saw the hard boots of a second Peacekeeper enter through the doorway.

"All children must report to President Snow's facilities for shelter from enemy fire," said the second Peacekeeper, reciting the words he'd memorized.

"It's true, Clarissa," said her mother's voice. "Jimmy and his sister across the street just left, too. It will be so exciting to see the President's house!" Callie's mom left the room, murmuring something about giving Callie one last makeover.

"Take what you need," continued the Peacekeeper. "All other possesions will now be the property of the Capitol. Searches will be promptly conducted in each household. Anything may be taken."

Callie stiffened, and I knew that neither of us were safe. Snow didn't give two cents about what happened to the kids, and I would be found as soon as Callie left. I didn't know what Callie suspected, but she knew enough not to trust the Peacekeeper's lies.

"I'd much rather stay here, thank you," Callie said stiffly. I heard her mother gasp in shock.

"This is not a discussion," said the first Peacekeeper in a monotone voice.

"I don't really care-" Callie's voice cut off and I heard her hit the wall next to me. I felt the vibrations from the wall shake the floor, and I knew she had been thrown hard.

I tried to pull myself out, knowing I had to protect Callie, but a shiny weapon was suddenly pressed against her head. Even in the Capitol, I could tell that the Peacekeeper was holding some kind of gun. Callie's eyes met mine for a moment, and we both looked at each other with a terrible understanding. I couldn't save Callie without getting us shot or killed.

I expected the Peacekeeper to help Callie to her feet before taking her away, but instead he knocked her in the head with the end of his gun. Callie slumped over with a cry of pain, and the Peacekeeper threw her over his shoulder, ignoring her small struggles. The door slammed shut and the noises in the hall faded away. I cursed silently.

They had taken her. I was right here, under their noses, and they had taken _her_. Next to me, I heard the lazy footsteps of the remaining Peacekeeper who was sifting through Callie's belongings. He let some things fall to the floor and continued looking through one of Callie's drawers.

Ignoring the pain in my ribs, I pulled myself out from under the bed and grabbed the Peacekeeper in a choke hold. I saw his surprised face and watched him try to reach for a button clipped to his waist. In one swift movement, I pushed my fingers against the soft spot in his throat and knocked his head into the lamp on the table. The Peacekeeper crumpled to the ground, alive but unconscious.

I quickly looked out the open window for any sign of Callie. I could just see the Peacekeeper carrying her around the corner. Children were being taken from every home on the street. They were being quickly walked toward the inner depths of the Capitol. As I took in the scene before me, I recognized the soft hum of hovercrafts in the air that had been there for weeks.

Walking to the open box next to the bed, I looked for anything that might be helpful. I saw dyes and brushes everywhere, and there were a couple syringes in the box. I thought of taking some of the drugs and a needle for protection, but quickly realized I wouldn't be able to carry it without hurting myself. I grabbed a jacket hanging from Callie's closet that was such a bright green it hurt my eyes. I swept some of the powdered dye under my eyes like I had seen on Capitol men, knowing the strange shimmery color would make it harder to recognize the distinct eyes of the Capitol's Golden Boy.

I knew I didn't have any more time to disguise myself. Whatever was happening with Callie and the other children was going to unravel soon. I stopped for a moment, hearing footsteps coming from down the hall. Without another second to think about it, I climbed out of the open window and let myself hang from the fragile windowsill.

I refused to look down, knowing I had to make the drop. I hated heights, but if I didn't move, I would be found in a few seconds. I felt my hands, already slipping, let go of the window's base as I fell to the ground.

I landed on my feet, but my knees buckled and I fell forwards, swallowing a mouthful of dirt. Despite my protesting muscles, I forced myself to stand up and walk into a nearby alley. I quickly zipped up the jacket, allowing its strange collar to cover the bottom of my face. Not wanting to waste any more time, I quickly started walking toward the center of the capitol, staying close to the walls and shadows.

As I got closer to Snow's mansion, I saw that it wasn't just kids being pushed around. The center of the Capitol was crowded and full of colorful Capitol citizens. I pushed through the crowd, keeping my head down. I tried to go as fast as possible without attracting too much attention. While many people seemed to be worried about something, other Capitol citizens were trying to act like today was just a typical day in the Capitol's history.

I couldn't help overhearing bits and pieces of conversations as I frantically searched for Callie. Two men were busily reading a newspaper, ignoring the slowly growing chaos around them.

"I've heard our scientists are actually developing primitive forms of telepathy and mind reading," said one man, his Capitol accent hitting me like a wave of nauseating perfume.

"How very interesting!" said the other. "I wonder what they will come up with next!"

Their calm conversation disgusted me, so I wasn't exactly sorry when I bumped into the first man and made him spill his drink all over the newspaper.

I moved into the crowd, where people had started to become frantic. Even if I hadn't been worried before, I had a good reason to be now. Everyone knew that when the Capitol citizens were afraid of something, you should run screaming in the other direction.

Suddenly, a spray of gunfire ripped through the crowd. Screams echoed in my ears, and I had to look down to make sure I wasn't hit. I didn't see any blood, so I kept moving. I saw a young girl bent over her mother, crying and begging for her to wake up. I froze, shocked still by the raw sadness in this little girl. I wanted to help her, but I knew there was nothing anyone could do for her now.

In that moment, the little girl looked up and saw me. Her eyes locked with mine, and I saw recognition flicker in them. I don't know what I would have done next. Maybe I would have taken her with me, or maybe I would have just walked away. I don't know.

The little girl's face turned into a fresh wave of agony and screams ripped out of her as she fell to the ground. The last thing I noticed before tearing myself away was the girl's bright yellow coat, splattered with blood.

Waves of bullets kept coming, but I just ducked my head and ran. I had to ignore the people screaming, the children crying. Later, they would add to the pile of faces that tortured me at night. I tried to help an old man with a bullet wound in his leg, but before I could reach him a pod went off and shot spikes right through his chest.

I jumped out of the way just in time. One of the spikes had sunk itself into my leg. Gritting my teeth, I pulled myself off and forced myself to limp away. The next instant, I dropped to ground as another round of bullets ricocheted across the entire block. Behind me, a woman collapsed, the bullets killing her instantly.

I pulled myself together and got back to my feet. I had to find Callie. In this mess, she could already be gone, but I refused to let myself think that way. I could only hope that, for once, the Capitol had kept its word. Maybe Snow really had let the children take refuge in his home. I almost convinced myself, but then I took a look around me, at the chaos that had unfolded in just minutes, and I knew it wasn't possible.

I used what energy I had left to break into a run, heading for the circle at the center of the town. Everything hurt, but I shook off the pain and kept moving. Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I heard a fresh round of cries and screams.

I almost stopped right there. I wanted to scream at everyone for being so careless, for letting this happen. I wanted to grab some stupid, fancy Capitol girl and demand to know who was responsible for this. I needed to know who was responsible for ruining my life, my world.

Even louder screams came from somewhere closer to Snow's mansion, and I knew who the person to blame was. I thought of Callie, and how she was technically another stupid, fancy Capitol Girl, but she had given up everything to help me. Snow had taken her, he had taken Annie, and he had tried to take me. He was going to pay.

I turned in the direction of Snow's mansion, my anger giving me the energy I needed to keep going. I was about to move when I was distracted by the sound of a girl yelling. Something about it had triggered a memory in my mind, and I couldn't help myself as I turned around. Across the block, I saw a girl yelling and gesturing frantically to a man.

"Katniss?" I yelled, but the girl didn't respond. Even if she could hear me, I knew it couldn't be her. The girl didn't look like Katniss. Still, there was something about the way she moved that stuck with me. She seemed determined to get somewhere, but she also kept stopping to look for the man she was with. I saw the girl scan the crowd quickly, searching for someone. Something happened on her side of the block, because I heard her suddenly shout and stumble backwards. I was staring at her, too shocked to move or think clearly.

"Run!" she screamed, and I just knew it was her.

"Katniss!" I screamed, trying to move forward towards her, but something stopped me. I looked down and realized I was falling. The floor that had been beneath me suddenly crumbled as a new pod was activated. A giant, gaping hole was opening in the road, sucking in anyone in its path. I was only on the edge of the hole, but it was still too late to stop myself from falling.

I quickly grabbed the doorknob of the house next to me, somehow still standing on the outskirts of the hole. I felt a popping sensation as my shoulder was jerked from the rest of my body. I hung from the door, my shoulder flaring in agonizing pain. I tried to breathe, refusing to stare down into the dark hole, deep as the abyss. Again, I really don't like heights.

With the strength of adrenaline coursing through me, I managed to throw myself up and to the side of the hole, away from its destruction. My feet still dangled over the side of the hole, which was becoming larger, so I pulled myself up and ran blindly forwards, my legs numb.

I was on the floor. My legs had given out, unable to take the pressure any longer. I knew my left leg was bleeding heavily, and I didn't have the time to fix my dislocated shoulder. Here, I was an easy target for Peacekeepers, but nobody was concerned right now with me. The gunfire had stopped as people ran, simply trying to survive.

Looking up, I saw that I had made it to the circle. Children were being held in the front of the mansion, looking scared out of their minds. Callie had to be here. I scanned the crowd frantically, looking for any sign of her. Instead, I stopped again.

I saw Prim. Prim, Katniss's sweet sister who had taken care of me so many times in Thirteen. I didn't know if Katniss knew she was here, or if she had been taken without her knowing. How had she even gotten here? I screamed her name over and over, but she was too far away to hear me.

I was struggling to get up, to reach Prim, when the world exploded.

The bombs from the parachutes kids were holding showered the circle with debris. The screams and cries bounced around in my mind, and I dimly wondered how it was possible that I heard even louder screaming. I pushed myself to my knees, unable to feel whatever injuries I had just gotten, land searched for Prim. I couldn't see her over the bodies and debris. Medics blocked my view as they tried to tend to the injured children.

That's when I realized what was happening. I remembered overhearing bits and pieces of Gale discussing his plan with Beetee. The chaos around me faded and the world fell silent as I _remembered_.

It was no coincidence that the bomb had been dropped here, in front of the children. This attack was from the rebels, not the Capitol. And it wasn't over.

It was that moment when I saw Callie. She was stuck in the crowd of children, kneeling down at someone's side, trying to comfort and help them. Again, Callie had stopped to help someone, and she was going to lose everything because of it.

I thought of Prim and of Katniss, and of where they were now. Were they even alive? Did Katniss know what was coming? Could she be doing the same thing as me, trying to save a hopeless disaster?

All of these thoughts ran through my mind as the chaos of the world came crashing back to my ears and I surged forward. Callie didn't even see me; she was too busy trying to help. She didn't know. The last few seconds flew by me in a rushed daze, as if they didn't even exist.

_And that's when the rest of the parachutes go off._

* * *

**That's the end of the chapter! This chapter is supposed to show what Finnick is going through at the same time as Katniss without them ever really interacting. Who do you think had a harder time? Do you notice any similarities between this and Chapter 24 of THG? Tell me what you noticed in the comments, and I'll reveal everything in the note after the next chapter.**

**What do you guys think happened to Finn and Callie?**

**Oh, and can we please talk about the fact that Sam Claflin is Finnick? I'm dying to hear everyone's opinion, and I'll post mine at the end of the next chapter! Can you picture Sam as the Finnick in my story?**

**Lastly, ohmyfreakinggeez THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH:) All of your support is so amazing and I'm so happy to have so many people reading this story! I love reading all of your comments, especially the crazy long ones. As to my self-proclaimed number one fan, I wish you would come off anon so I can thank you for kinda being the best person ever.**

**And don't worry, my story isn't ending for a long time.:)**

**So, sorry for the very long note. Go back to whatever you were doing before you read this. But first! Maybe let me know what you're thinking in the big box below? :D**

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_


	12. Note

**Hi, everyone! Sorry for the notification, but I just wanted to let everyone know that I am definitely continuing this story, and that I have a ton of stuff coming soon. I'm a bit of a perfectionist with my chapters, so I apologize for the the wait. Normally, chapters will come weekly. However, school just started and I need to get a handle on my crazy course load, so, in response to all of your questions (which I love, by the way), this week's chapter is gonna be a little late.**

**I'm thinking...Sunday? That's when the new chapter should be up by.**

**Harassment encouraged:P Hope to hear what you guys think so far and I can't wait for you guys to read a certain chapter coming up soon!**

**Thanks again!**

_~Just an ordinary girl :D_


	13. Hallucinations

**Annie**

* * *

"Try it again, with more force this time."

I nodded at Beetee before swinging my fist at the punching bag in front of me.

"Harder!" he shouted, and I took another punch.

At first, I felt pretty stupid. I was standing in an empty room with nothing besides a single punching bag and Beetee's shouting. My hands were gloved like a fighter and I had been pathetically trying to move the punching bag more than two inches. Only a few minutes later, and I was out of breath.

Just like that, Beetee had me switch to another station he had just finished setting up. I grabbed the hilt of the sword lying against the table and inspected the sharp blade that glinted in the light.

"Isn't this a little...old-fashioned?" I asked, really just trying to give myself time to get my breath back. Man, I was out of shape.

"You never know when the most basic instincts come in handy," Beetee said simply. I suddenly heard a rushing sound next to me and spun around quickly, lifting my sword up as I turned. I heard metal clanging on metal and realized another sword was inches away from my face.

I focused my eyes beyond the looming point of the sword to see Julian's widespread grin.

"Good thing you stopped me," Julian taunted. "I was afraid I'd get you for a second." I punched Julian hard with my right hand, still gloved from my punching bag attempts.

"Ow," he complained, rubbing his arm. "She's getting better," Julian called to Beetee.

Suddenly, I felt myself fall on my back as Julian kicked the back of my legs out from under me. He spun around and pointed his sword at the base of my throat, not letting me move an inch.

"It seems she still needs some work," Beetee mused, chuckling under his breath. Julian laughed and then held out a hand to help me up, but I was ready. I grabbed his hand and twisted it around his back, waiting until I heard him wince before loosening my grip. I checked to make sure Julian's sword wasn't on him, and then I jumped on his back, letting the combined force of our weight bring us crashing to the floor. I didn't let go of him when we hit the ground, keeping him on the floor despite his struggles to throw me off.

"Then again, I have been practicing since sunrise," I smirked.

"Okay, okay! I surrender!" Julian squealed in a very unmanly way, and I let him up with a laugh. I pretended not to see him wink at Beetee, knowing he had let me get the best of him. Julian was one of the best fighters in Thirteen, and would have been fighting in the war if it wasn't for his expertise in psychology. Of course, he was never certified, but Julian could read people as if their thoughts were playing in his head. He didn't talk about it much, but I knew Coin and the others made him spend hours every day watching television feeds of President Snow and other political figures. Secretly, I knew he was itching to help the rest of the rebels fighting in the Capitol.

Beetee left us in the training room, excusing himself to execute a new battle strategy. I wanted to sneak in to see what they were talking about, hoping I could help in some way, but I knew by now that nobody would ever let me get that close.

Julian and I practiced some sword fighting and even a little bit of archery. Julian pushed me throughout the training, making sure I didn't give up. He didn't mention last night. He didn't ask me why I had suddenly decided to start training. Julian knew what I needed without me explaining it to him, and so he trained with me until he was called away to the conference room.

After he left, I sat down, being careful not to put too much pressure on the bruises all over my body. My hands were cut and dirty, but I felt better knowing I had done something to make myself more useful. Finally, I allowed my thoughts to drift back to the one thing that was always on my mind.

I let myself fill my head with thoughts of Finn. I thought of his lopsided grin, his sparkling eyes, the way he always knew just what to say to me. I wanted so badly to believe that he was still out there, fighting to get back home. If he was dead, I would know it. I didn't feel an end to the connection that had tethered us to each other, and knew I could never give up hoping he was alive.

I used the remainder of the adrenaline coursing through my veins to form a real plan. I had to think rationally. I wasn't ready to believe Finnick was gone, but, wherever he was, he probably needed help. I would train as well as I could for a week or two. By then, nobody would be looking for Finnick's body. If I could convince Julian to take me outside, I could hide myself in the thickness of the woods and escape before anyone could catch up to me.

I quickly cleaned up the training room as best as I could, picking up the arrows I shot that had missed their target. I saw one that was a good ten feet away from where had been meant to hit and knew I needed a lot more practice before I could be any help to Finnick.

I was about to leave when I heard a noise that sounded like the wind blowing. I looked around and saw nothing, but when I turned back toward the door, my mother was standing in front of me.

I didn't know if I was about to experience an old memory or a new hallucination, but I wasn't going to stick around to find out. Just because my head was messed up, didn't mean I had to sit around and encourage it.

As I walked backwards, slowly approaching the door, I silently prayed that leaving would be enough to stop the people in my head from talking to me. Of course, my mind knew exactly how to stop me in my tracks.

My mother's image flickered and was replaced with Warren's, his face contorted with agony. My arms reached out involuntarily, wanting to take away his pain, but then the image changed again.

Boggs suddenly appeared in front of me. He was obviously running from something, but he stayed in his place in front of me. The image kept shifting, faster and faster, until every hallucination I had suffered flashed past me.

A sharp ringing had started, and by now I knew what was coming next. My hands clamped down on my ears, but the sound was inside my head and couldn't be muted. I could have been screaming out loud, I don't know.

For all the times this happened to me, I could never really explain what happened when the ringing started. Once, Finnick had tried to hold me as it happened, but he ended up with a broken nose from me and it only made things worse.

I was going to have a brand new hallucination. Lucky me, right? My mind would conjure up a new person for me to talk to, and I would take a step deeper into insanity. Along with my mother, my brother, and everyone else, would be a new face to torture me.

Suddenly, the ringing stopped. I opened by eyes carefully, not knowing what to expect.

Of all people, I saw Prim, Katniss's little sister. She was busy tending to a goat and wasn't looking at me, so I took a moment to pull myself together. Prim did not have a goat in Thirteen, I told myself, sorting through the facts I knew were true. I could confirm that she wasn't real. I quickly became angry with Prim. I had never done anything to her, so why was she in my head?

Prim was talking to the stupid goat now, murmuring and comforting it like it was a person.

"It won't hurt, I promise," she told the goat. "I just need a little bit of milk, okay?" Her voice was soft and compelling, but I just wanted to throw something at her to shut her up. I knew that I couldn't let myself give in to what I was seeing, or I might never come back to reality.

A sharp pain made me wince, and I shut my eyes quickly as a blur of colors flew by. I opened my eyes, blinking and trying to take in my new surroundings.

"I'll take it from here," The words were coming out of my mouth, but I couldn't control what I was saying.

"Thanks, Prim," someone replied, but I was already turning away and walking toward the hospital beds. Like my voice, I couldn't control my actions.

I watched myself fiddle with medical instruments I didn't understand, the beeping of a heart monitor machine always playing in the background. I'd always hated that noise, but now it was somehow comforting to me.

My hands came down to rest on the pillow of one of the beds. Someone was sleeping in the bed, and I began to play with her knotted hair, smoothing it out and making it look soft again.

It took me a few moments to realize what was going on. I was staring at the girl's bruised and tired face, but nothing clicked until I saw the necklace she was wearing. On a battered chain hung a chipped and broken seashell, which rested on the girl's neck. I knew that, back in reality, I was wearing that same necklace.

_I_ was the girl in the bed. I saw my moving hands more clearly now, suddenly realizing they were much too small to be mine.

I was Prim! Well, I was still me, and technically me was sleeping in that bed, but Prim was the one who was still stroking my hair. I watched myself sigh in my dream, breathing easier with Prim's gentle touch. Well...my touch, you know what I mean.

Another flash of pain came, and this time I heard faint screaming echoing in my ears. It disappeared as I found myself in a new place. I could immediately tell that something awful had happened here. Everything was cold and beak, from people's troubled faces to the somber gray clouds overhead. Everyone was surrounding an area I couldn't see, and I couldn't help walking toward what had made everyone so upset.

Through a fog of dust and debris, I saw a roped off section where the ground seemed to have caved in. Two men suddenly appeared out of the rubble, pulling a third man up from a makeshift hole. The man's face was black with coal. He bent down, coughing violently as he tried to inhale clean air. The two men helped him away, and I heard one man say that he was the last survivor.

I wondered why I was here, why I had to see such sadness. Some people stood by men covered in soot, holding them in relief. Others were starting to clean up the mess the cave-in had left. A few people were crying for the ones left behind, but I was only looking at one family.

A mother was yelling at one of the men cleaning the rubble, begging them to go back for the others. I could see him shaking his head no as she kept yelling, her whole body shaking with emotion. Finally, a teenage girl put her hand on the woman's shoulders, whispering something to her softly. I watched the mother rock back and finally sit on the ground, sobbing loudly.

The girl kept her hand on her mother's shoulder, and I realized I was watching Katniss Everdeen. Her mouth was set in a firm line, and I could see in her determined eyes that she was refusing to cry.

Clinging to her was Prim, looking much younger and more vulnerable than I had ever seen her. Tears were streaming down her face, her innocent eyes filled with a grief no child should have to bear. Her lips moved, and I realized she was repeating her fathers name over and over again.

I was reminded of my mother and Warren's sudden deaths, and knew exactly what this younger Prim was feeling. Forgetting for the smallest moment that what I was seeing wasn't real, I stepped forward, wanting to help her. The motion sent me flying forwards as the grays of District Twelve blended together and I was again surrounded by a dizzying array of pictures.

I could only catch bits and pieces of what was going on around me; it was so disorienting. The screams that had been echoing in my ears now became thunderous. Soon, I couldn't hear anything but the ringing in my ears. My cheek was pressed against rough ground, and everything felt like it was on fire. Once again, my thoughts were not my own. I felt my heart race and fear engulf me as my eyes began to close of their own accord. I felt myself trying desperately to reach forward, to find someone.

_I want my sister,_ Prim's thoughts echoed in my mind. The blinding pain I felt was very real, and made it impossible for me to separate hallucination from reality as Prim's thoughts became my own.

I tried to reach Katniss, knowing it was the most important thing to do, but I couldn't move my arms. If I couldn't find her, I would die. I had to tell her about President Coin. I struggled to remember what I knew, to have the words on my tongue so I could yell them to my sister, but my mind was getting foggier with the pain and I couldn't remember what I had to say. I tried to scream her name, but my voice wouldn't work. Someone fell on me, and then I couldn't take the pain anymore. As my eyes closed, I felt a lone tear escape.

"Annie!" I heard, and my scorched body was being shaken. "Annie, look at me!"

My eyes opened, even though I hadn't realized they were closed. The screaming had ceased to exist, and I was back in the training room, but I was still shaking, tears streaming down my face as I tried to speak.

Julian was bent worriedly over me, his hands still grasping my shoulders. Behind him, I saw a medic standing with a sheepish Beetee, a syringe wrapped in his hand. Julian followed my gaze, seeing what I was staring at.

"Don't worry," he said quickly. "I'm not letting them touch you. It's fine, guys," he said firmly, trying to make them leave.

"No," I said, my voice breaking. "Let them do it." Julian looked at me in shock, his eyes continuously studying mine. I don't know what it was he saw, but when the medic came over with the needle, he didn't stop him.

For once, I was grateful when I felt the sharp prick of the needle in my arm. Whatever the medic had given me was strong, and already my body wasn't shaking so badly as my heartbeat was forced to slow down. I didn't know why the medic hadn't tried to get me in a bed first, but I didn't care. Sleep was the only chance I had of escaping my hallucinations. I would take whatever nightmares came tonight.

Slowly, Julian put his arms under me, and I could tell he was acting with a new carefulness. He scooped me up gingerly, holding me close to him as he began to walk toward the hospital wing, his eyes glossy.

"You can't give up, Annie," Julian said softly, kissing the top of my head, but I was too busy clinging to him for protection until the drugs closed my eyes for me and took me away.

* * *

**So...technically, it's Sunday:P So sorry it's been so long since my last update, but I had a 37 page paper to write:/**

**The next chapter is the one I've been waiting to show you guys since I first started writing this Finnific :))**

**Thoughts on Annie? Or Julian? Or life? Lemme know in the big box below:)**

****_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_


	14. Confessions

**Finnick**

* * *

My arms were wrapped tightly around Callie's waist, pinning the both of us to the ground. I held on to her for my life, for both of ours, praying we wouldn't be blown to pieces in the next second. The ringing in my ears had been replaced with a dull nothingness. I don't know how long I stayed that way, clutching Callie's lifeless body, my cheek being rubbed raw against the ground.

When I was younger, before the Capitol even knew my name, I stubbed my toe really hard on a rock in the ocean and started to cry.. One of the older kids had waded into the water with me and slapped me across my face. Shocked, I stopped making noise and started rubbing my cheek, which now stung from the palm of the boy's hand.

"What did you do that for?" I had asked, my chin trembling as I tried not to cry again.

"Sometimes focusing on something else that hurts makes your other pains disappear," he told me, trying to sound wise when he was really pleased with himself for teasing a young boy. I stood alone in the knee deep water after he left, thinking over what he had said and now sporting two injuries.

I used to tell myself that this older boy had been trying to warn me about a lot more than a stubbed toe. I would think of the hardships this boy could have gone through. In my mind, he was giving me advice for the Games, but I knew that couldn't be true. The boy was nothing but a blurred face in my memory. If he'd been in any part of the Games, I would have known. No, this boy couldn't have been more than ten years old at the time, just trying to mess with a little kid and feel superior. The only significance his advice had was in my own mind.

Shaking myself out of my reverie, I was dazed and oblivious to everything in the world except what was necessary for survival. My body went into autopilot, working on its own to get me out of another mess. I couldn't see much through the dusty haze that had filled the circle. Whether the fogginess was from the debris of the explosions or my own clouded head, I didn't know. I didn't know what injuries I had other than my burning cheek, which stung fiercely with every move I made, keeping me alert.

Slowly, I ripped myself apart from the pieces of destroyed houses and the chunks of ground I seemed to be endlessly buried under. I couldn't hear screams, only an eerie silence. Somehow, I was up on my feet. I felt myself swaying, or maybe it was the ground that was moving. I started walking forward until I remembered Callie. She had been on the ground next to me, but she wasn't there anymore.

Amazedly, I realized I was carrying her. I kept walking, not looking down at her face or anywhere else except straight ahead. I didn't look to see if she was awake or if she had been injured. I couldn't.

I heard voices faintly carrying their way to my ears; my senses became slightly more focused with each step I took. I knew that whatever had happened to me was only an effect of the bombing, but I couldn't help wondering if this was how Annie felt when she lost sight of the world around her. It was disorienting and painful, but I was just glad to be alive, to be able to make it back to her.

I searched the area around me and saw that I had walked down an alley filled with debris and activated pods. I realized that we must have been caught in the very edge of the explosions, because although there was plenty of destruction, bodies weren't littered on the streets like they were towards the center of the circle. If Callie had been just a few feet closer to the rest of the children instead of helping that little kid, everything would have been over.

My head was pounding, and I felt the first signs of pain resurface as my body began to recover from the shock of the blasts. My legs began to wobble, and then shake violently. I wouldn't be able to hold Callie much longer. To my left was a house with its roof somehow ripped off the top, abandoned and desolate. It was perfect. I managed to open the door with Callie in my arms, and it fell of its hinges as I swung it open. I hurried through the door and into the next room of the house, hoping that anyone who came inside wouldn't bother searching its rooms. Under the circumstances, it was the best I could do.

I tripped over the threshold of the room's entrance and came crashing down to the floor, my legs refusing to support my weight any longer. I managed to keep a hold on Callie and took the blow of the fall as we hit the ground. A moan escaped my mouth, and then I was so tired I was surprised I could make any noise at all. More than anything, I wanted to stay where I was and sleep, but I knew I had to asses our situation first. First survive, then rest.

"Callie?" I called softly, my throat aching with the effort it took to speak. "Callie, can you hear me?" She was lying across my chest, her hair sprawled out so that I couldn't see her face. With a groan, I sat up and took her in my arms, finally allowing myself to look at her clearly. Her eyes were closed, her expression peaceful and slack, the exact opposite of what I was used to seeing. It worried me.

She had an angry red cut across her forehead and plenty of bruises covering her shoulders and arms. I gently lifted her arm and turned it over in my hands, feeling her bones to make sure nothing was broken. Her knuckles were torn and bleeding, but none of her injuries seemed to be fatal. I felt the back of her head, which was tender and had a large bump forming. I hoped the hit to her head had only knocked her out. Unable to think of the alternative, I continued to examine her.

I pulled the edges of her shirt up over her stomach, knowing I needed to check all of her body to be sure she was okay. One particularly bad bruise was turning a dark blue and hidden by her shirt, and I needed to be sure Callie hadn't broken any ribs. I was about to lift her shirt up when Callie began to stir.

"Don't even think about it," she said groggily, weakly swatting my hand away from her shirt. I laughed tiredly, relieved to see she was okay. I pushed Callie's hair away from her face as she blinked her eyes, trying to bring the world into focus.

"I have to make sure you didn't break anything," I told her gently. "Plus, you've already had your turn looking at me," I teased, trying to make light of the moment.

"S'not the same thing," she slurred. She pressed her hands on the floor and tried to push herself up. Knowing she was determined to act fine, I helped her into a sitting position. I let her steady herself against the wall as she caught her breath.

"You okay?" I asked. Callie nodded her head stiffly.

"Yeah. How about you?"

"Never been better."

We stayed like that for a while, both of us replaying the events in our head but not ready to talk about them yet, to admit they were real. Callie winced as she took in another breath, and I saw her try to stop the pain from reaching her eyes.

"I really need to take a look at you," I told her.

"You're not looking so grand yourself, Golden Boy," she snapped.

"There's the Callie I know," I said as she pulled herself up from the wall and grabbed my chin, pulling my face forward to look at my cheek.

"Ow!" I yelped, but she ignored me. She looked at my injuries and I looked at hers, but in the end there wasn't much either of us could do for each other. We had no medical supplies or food, and our enemies were all around us. Despite her protests, I helped Callie to lie down on the small, empty bed in the corner of the room, which had been all but broken in two. I wanted to rip off a piece of my shirt to tie around her head wound, but she wouldn't let me.

"You won't be able to get around here unnoticed if you start flashing your naked chest at every Capitol citizen who walks by," she countered. She ended the discussion by grabbing my injured arm, something I had been trying to hide from her.

"Let's go, Golden Boy," she said. "You know I have to pop your shoulder back in."

"Just try not to enjoy this too much," I said, gritting my teeth to brace myself for the pain.

Let's just say that wasn't a moment of my life I'd like to repeat any time soon.

I let Callie fall asleep as I took the first watch, but I hoped the Capitol had enough fighting for one day. I tried not to pay attention to the gash in my leg from the pod's spikes. I would deal with the pain and was just grateful that the spikes hadn't been coated with some deadly poison.

It was easy enough to stay awake tonight; I wasn't ready for the nightmares that would be sure to come the next time I let my eyes close. But Callie was nothing if not reliable, and, despite her injuries, woke up before the sun rose to take the next watch. She sat herself up and stretched her arms out, trying her best to ignore the pain in her limbs.

We sat in silence for a while. I wasn't ready to sleep and Callie seemed more than a little shaken.

"It's because of my brother," Callie said suddenly, breaking the silence. She was looking away from me, toward the ceiling.

"What?" I asked, very confused.

"It's because of my brother," she said again. "That's why I'm helping you." She kept talking, not waiting for a response from me.

"He was given the _honor_ of becoming a tribute for the 73rd Hunger Games," she said, practically spitting out her words. "He was happy to go-thrilled, actually! I felt like I was the only one who wasn't thrilled at the chance of sending my brother off to his death." Callie looked at me then, her eyes glossy and full of pain.

"Do you know what they did to him?" she said softly. Then she broke out into a yell. "Do you?" And as she told the story back to me, I remembered the boy. I remembered being relieved when he died because it meant one less Career for my tributes to have to face. Now, I felt my stomach twist sickeningly.

"Marius hadn't met up with the other Careers yet, but he was on his way. They had planned it before the Games had even started, but the Careers were particularly strong that year, and most of the group had already been formed. The Gamemakers had to keep it interesting, so what did they do?" Callie's voice broke, and I heard anger replace the sadness in her voice as she kept talking.

"They sent a pack of hybrid wolves after him, tore him to shreds. Then they just left him there, alone and slowly dying. The cannon didn't sound until two hours after he was attacked." Tears streamed down Callie's face, and her jaw trembled slightly. "He never even had a chance," she said. "He never even had a chance."

I pulled Callie into my arms, letting her bury her face in my shoulder. I pretended I didn't know she was crying. My anger at the Games rose even higher, and I vowed that I would make the Capitol pay for everything they had done, for everyone they had destroyed. I looked at the girl in my arms, who was so young but had suffered so much. A fierce wave of protectiveness washed over me.

"I'm so sorry," I murmured over and over again, but by now we both knew that sorry doesn't fix anything. Callie pulled away from me and took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"You have to get him, Finnick," she said, looking straight into my eyes. I knew exactly who she was talking about. "You have to put an end to all this."

"I know," was all I said. It was all I needed to say. Callie seemed satisfied, and she stood up to sit on the edge of the bed, leaving her spot for me.

"Sleep," she ordered. "When you wake up, we're getting out of here." She seemed happy to be in control again, or as in control as she could be.

"I'm two steps ahead of you," I told her, but I let myself lie down on the bed and close my eyes. "Tomorrow, we go to Snow's mansion."

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**Hey guys! So I know I said this would be the huge chapter with the plot twist, but I really liked this scene and decided to make it longer and let it be its own chapter. The next chapter is the one I've been planning from the beginning of the Finnific:)**

**I forget how much I love writing this ****fic until I'm actually writing it, so please feel free to harass me for new chapters:P**

**I'll post the next chapter at 70 reviews...well, I might post it sooner:) I just like to know people are still reading this story because I put so much effort into it, so please R & R!**

**And last but not least, did you guys see those set pics for Catching Fire? *so excited***

_~ Just an ordinary girl :D_**  
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